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writes: My girlfriend of two years left me because she thinks I cheated on herBut I didn't ... I tried to talk to her, to tell her the truth, but she will not talk to me at all.Seh has blocked me from her phone ... I'm soo. Soo in love with her my heart hurts so bad and I have not talked to her in three weeks now ... what do I say to get her to talk?How can I prove to her I didn't cheat? ... I just need a chance to talk to her. But I have know idea how to get her to talk ... I never seen anyone do this no talking stuff ... how can I get her to talk? ???? I just am out of ideas ... Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2012): "what do I do now????"
Seek professional help. Seriously.
If you called her to tell her you're done trying, then you're not done trying to get her back.
If you still want her back, then you have lost your capacity to make rational decisions for yourself.
Please seek counselling. ASAP.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI called her today I sead I'm done I'm not trying anymore ... I love you but I'm given up .... she text me .. and asked to send her all the pictures of her I had. I sead ok. Ill print them out and send them. I told her if she gave me a chance I would make this up to her and make things right. She sead. It don't matter what I say or do it's not going to fix anything. I sead so we are over? She has not sead anything back .... I think she is messing with me I don't know. I want her back but I had about enuff of this game ... if anything she is in the wrong now for dragging this out ... what do I do now????
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2012): "I'm just going to give up .. I can't fix anything with someone that don't talk. I can't do anything. I love her with all my heart but. It don't matter when your talking to a wall"Congrats for wake-up call, belated is better than never. One slight semantic clarification; you can't possibly "love her with all [your] heart" because she never had a place for your heart in her life which means you can only "love her with all [your] penis" implication being that you can STILL love her with all your penis because she DID have a place for your penis in her life if not your heart, and so you STILL DO have a place for the place she had for your penis in YOUR life if not her heart).
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2012): "I'm just going to give up .. I can't fix anything with someone that don't talk. I can't do anything. I love her with all my heart but. It don't matter when your talking to a wall"Congrats for wake-up call, belated is better than never. One slight semantic clarification; you can't possibly "love her with all [your] heart" because she never had a place for your heart in her life
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI'm just going to give up .. I can't fix anything with someone that don't talk. I can't do anything. I love her with all my heart but. It don't matter when your talking to a wall
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (26 October 2012):
 There's something that 's not clear here...
Pardon me, OP, it's not that I want to grill you or nitpick, but I can't make much sense of what you say... first you say that you feel you never did anything wrong because when you went on the dating sites you were broken up , then you say you wrote her admitting that you messed up, how did you mess up if you weren't doing anything wrong ?
Were you officially, explicitely broken up when you went on the sites ? ...Had it been said clearly , and finally, " it's over " ? ( not that she could not feel hurt,humiliated and angry all the same even if it hadn't,, seeing that you were moving on in just a week time, - but at least ,technically speaking, she could not call it " cheating " )...
Or were you ( at least she THOUGHT you were ) " on a break " , or going through a bad period,... keeping some distance,... or any other variation of not getting along but not having really , seriously split up ?... in this case, yes, she might feel betrayed, I am not saying she'd be right, but as I said in my previous post some women draw the line of cheating way before of actual physical act.
( And why had she gone incommunicado then ? The other time ? .. if by any chance was because of trust or jealousy issues, well, your visit to the dating sites was just like waving a red cloth under a bull's nose, and that would explain her super strong reaction ).
Conclusion, if you have visited the sites while she was under the impression that you were not officially broken up, you may inadvertently have tripped into her dealbreaker. You may feel is not a big deal, I may feel it's not a big deal... but if she feels dating sites= proof of intention of cheating = dealbreaker, I am sorry but her behaviour is expectable, she won't change her mind, or not that soon anyway.
If instead, there was no doubt you were broken up, true , you haven't doene anything wrong technically, that does not mean she must be happy and feel loved and appreciated following to this episode, she 'll need some time , space and distance to cool down.
You've done your part and more, you have written letters, apologized ( but for what if you feel you did not do anything), explained your version and point of view....
maybe now she just needs some time and space to think about things and to miss you. Let her be for a while, clearly now she is furious and won't be mollified. Try again in a while, ( hoping that SHE is not one to move on that fast ).
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female
reader, sweetiebabes  +, writes (26 October 2012):
 Leave her alone and no contact..this just means you are giving her space. But stop torturing yourself as well. Live your life the way you used to when she was not in your life, this will help you to move forward. If she doesn't contact you any longer,then you need to accept the truth and the reality of your relationship and move on and heal.
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWhen someone don't talk when you ask a question or send a poem or I have a car payment and she only knows the way to get into r accounts I can't get anything from her she will not even say stop or. Go away ... nothing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How do you. Do anything with someone that dose that. I have Done every possible thing to get her to even say what she thinks happened she has not told me one word ....
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI sent her letters
.. saying sorry. I really know I mest up I told her every thing. In my letters. But I have not hurd anything from her ... how could you sped two years with someone and just say nothing to them ... I sent flowers candy poems. ... she don't care about me ... we had a good life ... we was best friends ... I work I have a good job
.pay bills. I just do not get it at all. She is not a kinda person that ignors any thing???????
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionShe did this one time before. For a week ... I started to just move o. Looked at some date sites ... when we got back together she took my phone and seen the date sites on it and kicked me out ... we was broken up when I got on there. And I did not see anyone I just wanted to talk. Because I could not talk to her ... I didn't cheat. I miss her so much ...
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female
reader, malvern  +, writes (26 October 2012):
 If you really didn't cheat on her, and there's no other reason you can think of as to why she won't talk to you, then I suggest you call in the help of a third party such as her best friend (or other person she knows well). Explain the situation to them. They may be able to talk to her and make her see your side of things.
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (26 October 2012):
 Sometimes, you just have to let go and put a friendship/relationship behind you.... This is one of those times...
Good luck....
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female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (26 October 2012):
You don't give us much to work on, would you mind to elaborate a bit ? like, why exactly does she think you have cheated on her ? ..
Sorry to sound mistrustful, but with daily reading of DC posts one comes to realize that many persons give a very restrictive definition of cheating, and they don't understand, or pretend not to understand, that their partner may have another more inclusive definition.
So we have guys who wrote " I never cheated on her, I just sexted this other girl "or " I only kissed another girl when I was drunk " -well, that IS actually cheating in the book of tons of persons. Cheating is not only stictly intercourse .
It's not about body parts, it' about loyalty. Even having invited a female friend out for dinner or a movie, without telling your gf.... it may be very well be non sexual, or non- romantic, but it certainly can be seen as disloyal. If there's nothing wrong with your actions, why keep them a secret, you know what I mean ?
My point is , if she is so stark raving mad that after two years of r/ship, she won't even talk to you, something must have happened , that she took in the wrong way, ... but she must have had some sort of strating point to begin with. Had you never ever given her reason previously to feel insecure or suspicious ?
- the other possibility is that yes, she just has issues and is totally jealous and paranoid over nothing, and in this case, I don't know if you aren't, after all, lucky to be rid of her. This is cliche' and nevertheless it is true, without mutual trust relationships are doomed. It may be very well just her own issue, her own problem, yet if SHE does not want to work on it , you can't be together.
In the meantime, though, and not knowing the details, I'd tell you, write her a letter. Put your heart in it, explain her the circumstances, set any possible misconceptions right, and hope for the best.
I don't think she will be so mad that she would jsut rip your letter in pieces without reading what you've got to say first.
As for the proof of your faithfulness, well, she should not need any proof, either you trust a person or not.
So, once again, and forgive me for the repetition, either you have done something silly that put you in some ambiguous position, and you have to be sorry and sincerely apologize for that... or she is totally, unreasonably paranoid and , well, maybe you don't need a paranoid gf...
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2012): I just can't believe a man can lose ideas how to talk to a girl they love..Well if she blocked you. use another phone number to call her.Try to ask help from her friends, send her flowers, send her food. until such time she will be overjoy of the sweet things your doing. Goodness, this is how my ex bf does when i dont want to talk to him . It always work all the time. The only time it wont work, if the damage you've done is too big and cannot be fix anymore. But surely she will talk to you, its just that there's no guarantee that she will take you back if you've done really bad.If you LOVE Her do your best to get her back. Be consistent, Mean what you say, Dont Give up too soon, In other words, BE A MAN.. Good luck..
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female
reader, sweetiebabes +, writes (26 October 2012):
Write a letter and tell her about your feelings, be open with honesty and wait for her reply. If she doesn't still respond, give her the space she needs at least you tried your best to communicate.
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