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I declined cake when I wanted to accept it

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Question - (17 August 2022) 3 Answers - (Newest, 18 August 2022)
A female Nigeria age 18-21, anonymous writes:

In my workplace a girl did her birthday yesterday and offered me cake i decline when i want to say yes and our boss birthday is today i was offered cake again but i still decline even though i was expecting the cake i wanted to say yes but i blurted out no and when they are eating it i don't feel regret even if it is a shame i decline. Is there anything wrong with it as i think it may be because of pride.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (18 August 2022):

Honeypie agony auntIt's OK to say, on second thought yes I would like a piece of cake.

Or if you feel that would hurt your pride, no cake for you.

This is trivial, OP

It's a piece of cake. A kind offer, no more, no less.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2022):

A good therapist can help you to become more laid back and less conscientious about each tiny thing. You worry far too much about trivial things now, that would put a stop to it. You cannot go through life worrying about hundreds of tiny things and asking all and sundry each time something happens. How would they know anyway, most of them are not therapists and can only guess it and probably get it all wrong.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2022):

Stop and think about why you're declining something you've been offered in goodwill.

You have to have a reason behind making any decision. Never decide on an "impulse;" because that's when you will have regret or guilt. Think first, then make a decision. Don't blurt-out an answer; that indicates you don't weigh your thoughts, and make careful considerations before you act. People who act without thinking can be dangerous to themselves and to others. You'll hurt feelings for no reason.

Saying no to cake is no big deal, but the principle is "why?"

You may do it because you don't want people to think you're greedy. I know ladies who are ashamed of their weight; and always pretend to avoid fattening foods or deserts, yet people can see their weight isn't changing. You may as well enjoy yourself, and not worry about what people think.

People you've been around for a long-time will share with you; and most cakes are store-bought. You may as well take a tiny piece to be cordial and friendly with your co-workers. Join in the celebration, but you don't have to eat it. It appears "snobbish." That proves nothing. Declining for no apparent reason isn't polite. It's just silly, when you really wanted it after all.

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