A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Thank you and hello Andrew.I justwanted to ask a personal question that's quite embarrassing but has been weighing on my mind.On Thursday night my friend and i had sex for the first time before he left for his hometown.We've discussed having sex before but nothings ever happened and well as most often times things go it didn't quite happen the way I expected but from the things he said after the fact, ex: 'You know how wear a brotha out.'And the result of him having a lot of ejaculation in his condom i figured he enjoyed it but i freaked out while having sex with him when i was on top position and i couldn't feel him.I was wet and it was slippery but i couldn't feel anything. I felt like maybe he couldn't either and that maybe im loose... I have 3 children so know that my vagina is not anywhere near as strong as it used to be but i hate to feel or be loose.I thought maybe after we did it he'd want to do it again but he was tired.I havent heard from him after that, he did text me to tell me he was on his way to the airport and thank you for hanging out with him and to kit, but i've been secretly wondering, of course not wanting to ask him thinking he'll think im insecure, but i'm truly wanting to know. Could you give me any suggestions?
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condom, ejaculation, insecure, text, vagina Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 August 2009): He had a lot of ejaculate, so he must have felt somehting. If you cannot feel him, perhaps you want to work on your vaginal muscles to tighten them up.
There is also a plastic surgery procedure to tighten up an older vagina.
A
female
reader, Crazy-Candice  +, writes (24 August 2009):
 Its terrible that you should feel like this, I find taking a few breaks to dry down there helps immensely. the guy probably wasnt very big anyway. No worries sex is about fun and relaxing not a competition and sounds like he was pleased with the affair anyway :)
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A
female
reader, summer187* +, writes (24 August 2009):
Hey, if he came it couldn't have been all that bad for him could it?! Sometimes when it's really wet and slippery like that it's normal not to feel a lot of friction. If it happens again- take a few minute breaks in between with some foreplay and wipe him off with something before you go riding away. =) (That is of course if your wet enough). The last thing you want is for you to come to a screeching hault on his dick! ;) And there are products out there for you to try. You could try Liquid Virgin Drops...it's like old china shrink cream. It works for some women making them feel tighter. What happened when you freaked out when you couldn't feel him? Did he notice? Because if he did- he's probably not wondering about you feeling loose at all, he probably feeling embarrassed about not being big enough. That's probably how he took it and maybe he's feeling embarrassed about the situation too. He took the first step in at least texting you, so it probably wasn't just a booty call. If it was just a booty call and it was bad- he wouldn't have contacted you at all. He would have just moved onto the next. He may have feelings for you and just might be a little insecure because (you said you were friends) and that friendship has moved onto a physical level now. Now you just both have to figure out where it goes from there. One time thing or relationship/dating. I hope this helps in some way! Best of luck to you!
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