| A
age
41-50,
*
writes: Okay everybody, Please bare with me as I try to explain. I was with my partner for a long time. We met when we were both 21. I knew I'd met my soul mate. She was the same. We just got each other in a way that I never thought and knew was possible. Anyway, about a year and a half ago we split up. She did a terrible thing. I don't really want to go into what she done. As a result we split up. The thing is I was still madly in love with her and I knew that and she was still in love with me. She told me she regretted what she did and wanted us to get back together. Anyway, I tried, but I was finding it really difficult to forget what she done. We tried for a year to get back together. Anyway, a few months ago she started to see someone else. I was totally heartbroken all over again. Now I want to be as honest as I can. I wrote to her, I text her, I sent flowers. Done all the mushy stuff. I realised how much I wanted her in my life and couldn't be without her. The guy she was seeing found out and he told me that he was moving in with her. They were getting engaged and trying for a baby. I watched my soul mate change over night. This wasn't the person I once knew and it didn't make sense to me so I backed off. Then yesterday I was out for a run and as I was crossing the road I saw her car coming along. I kept on running and she pulled up next to me. I kept running and she asked me to stop running she wanted to talk. I stopped eventually, but said there was nothing to talk about. She said we needed to talk so I asked her what was up. I'll try and be as detailed as I can. She asked me how I was. I told her I was as well as can be expected. As I said there really isn't anything to discuss, I told her I still loved her and that she was in love with this new guy. To which she replied it's not as simple as that. I said it was. Asked if I could get back to my run. She asked me to please talk to her. I said, Listen I love you, you love him end of. She didn't say anything. I said he had told me about them getting engaged and they were trying for a baby. I could see in her eyes she didn't have a clue what I was talking about. I said okay. I'll ask you a different question. I said Are you still in love with me? And she closed her eyes. I asked her again, and again she closed her eyes again. I asked her a third time, and the third time she said she didn't. To which I replied what did you stop me for then? I started to get upset. She started to get upset. She offered me a lift home, but I said I was fine. She then put her hand on my chest. I took her hand. She said things are such a mess and said I have to go. You know where I am. She got back in her car and I went back on my run. Thing is I know in her heart. I could see it in her eyes she was still in love with me. And I'm still in love with her. But is it just me. Am I not seeing things clearly because I'm in the middle. Please help? I hope I've made it clear. Thanks.
View related questions:
engaged, flowers, get back together, heartbroken, I love you, soulmate, split up, text, trying for a baby Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, BondGirl72  +, writes (5 July 2012):
 I am sorry you are going through this situation. I think things are as simple as you say, so I am not sure why she is making it complicated. Either she likes you or the other guy...there isn't anything more to it. If things were more complicated than that, she should have told you when she had your attention, but she didn't. I think you are doing the right thing. You've told her how you feel and if she can't figure out her own situation then that is her problem. I feel as if she stopped you to try to get you involved in whatever drama is currently going on in her life. You laid the situation out very nicely and she didn't try to explain herself. I would let her go. It sounds as if you are a nice guy and you deserve someone who isn't going to constantly play games with you.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (5 July 2012):
 You need to move on here. You have told her you still love her, you have done all the mushy stuff but it just did not work. She has moved on and is with someone else now and you need to respect that. I know that it is difficult to accept and yes I am sure she still cares deeply for you and am sure you could see that in her eyes. But I really don't think she is going to come back to you. I am sure she is worried about you and she does not want to see you hurting but you need to let her go. I know that it is difficult but it will get easier in time.
...............................
A
female
reader, Crazy Fox  +, writes (4 July 2012):
 Hi,You are seeing things clearly but you don't want to accept them the way they're. You need to calm down and spare yourself lingering heartache. It sounds to me like she doesn't know what she wants and she messed up things by going out with that new guy. + You said it yourself that she has done something terrible in the past. You need to let her go. You will heal with some time and be a better man. I might sound cool here, but in the same time I am still recovering after a break up with my fiance. It's been 7 months since we broke up and I have been fighting for him over all this time. Nothing helped and I guess nothing will. You can't change her feelings by declaring your love and buying flowers and stuff. I did all of that crazy stuff and I am a girl! It's hard and it sucks but the best way is to walk away and let her be happy if she thinks she is going to be happy with the new guy. She of course has feelings for you, but I don't really see how this all still can work out between you too. Sorry for being direct :(Regards,Crazy Fox
...............................
|
