A
male
age
36-40,
*eoloverboy23
writes:I have a serious question that has been bothering me for a couple of days. I met this girl two months ago online and she and I were fully in love with each other. We always chat almost everyday and she has been sending me pictues of her. I thought she was really cute and I even thought I was a lucky guy to have her in my life. However, I had suspicions about her because those photos that she had sent me were too good to be true. I also had a feeling that she was hiding a secret that she did not even share with me. Well, upon Saturday I had confronted her about that secret and she said that she was NOT a girl at all. She is a transexual. I was sort of shocked by this secret and then I asked her why she had lied to me about it. She said that she didn't want to hurt me because she really loved me. At first I truly loved her, but now I'm pretty much confused. I am NOT a homosexual and I love women, but how come I feel that I care about her? Tomorrow, I want to tell her how I feel and I want to tell her that she and I should be friends, but I don't want to hurt her. I really want to be in a relationship with a very beautiful woman and I thought my girlfriend was the one, but when she told me about all of this, I am devastated and confused. What should I do about this? Should I break up with her or should I stay? I hate it when girls deceive me, especially transgenders. I forgave her, but I won't forget it. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Neoloverboy23 +, writes (11 August 2009):
Neoloverboy23 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Well actually, vivatrev, we broke up. Couldn't handle all of the lies that "she" had. I'm currently in a new relationship witha woman. That was so last year when I wrote it because at the time I was more confused about my sexuality, but not anymore. Thanks for responding to that od article. :)
A
female
reader, Rebel13 +, writes (30 September 2008):
 Always Neo, Keep me updated with how all is going for you.
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A
male
reader, Neoloverboy23 +, writes (29 September 2008):
Neoloverboy23 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you somuch for that answer. That really clear up everything and I will try my best to love and care for her as much as I can. I guess morally I didn't understand that at all, but know I do. Again I really want to thank you for that very extraordinary answer. :D
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 September 2008): Transsexual is a person who believes that his or her body does not reflect his or her true 'inner' identification of physical sex or gender. Your girlfriend prolly never felt like she belonged living life as a man. Well it figures you'd still care for her and feel that you still love her. You fell in love with the WOMAN that she is. She has and always had the mentality of a woman. Some say it is a case of the wrong brain being born to the wrong body. And it happens.
But honestly, Does it make a difference if she WAS a man in the past? She IS a woman now and from what you say a beautiful one and one that loves you the same. You shouldn't see it really as deceiveing. Being a transexual is a scary thing when it comes to dating life. You said so yourself, she is too good to be true and good women and men are hard to come by now. Its not wrong to be in love and its not wrong to love someone different either. Just because she was a man doesn't make you are a homosexual.
I think you should stay and give it a chance, find out why she had the change done, try to be understanding on where she is coming from. If it doesn't work out and you can't let it go and love her for her now, then yes break it off. There is no reason to drag both of you along in something that won't work.
My now best friend is a transexual. Female to male. So I know how you feel.
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