A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: So I took everyone's advice on here and stopped calling my EX. He moved across country and didn't want to be with me--Fine. I'm learning to accept it. Now comes the fun part---he won't stop calling me. He called me on Saturday, twice on Sunday, Monday, emailed me on Tuesday and then called my office TODAY. I didn't even know it was him when I picked up the phone because I don't know his work number. So...he talks about some BS for awhile and asks why I wasn't calling him back. I just said I was busy doing things, blah blah blah. I told him I couldn't talk anymore because I was at work and had to go. He asked if I could call him tonight to chat about "things." Should I just not call? I'm trying to get over this and he just keeps making it harder. On another note, we are supposed to go to a wedding together July 5th (he was going to fly in) and I feel like that would not be a good idea. All of these feelings are going to come back and physically and emotionally I don't think I can take it anymore.Can anyone give me some advice? Should I just go and talk to him AGAIN and figure out what the hell is going on or just cut my losses and end it for good?Thank you!!
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at work, my ex, wedding Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2008): Sorry, it would be wise to ask him once again if he loves you and wants to be with you. If he dosen't then it's no contact I'm afraid. Trust me, it's for the best.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2008): Your living my story girl. Stay away, every time you see hear from him it just makes things worse, and it starts to hurt more and more. STAY AWAY.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2008): Thanks for the advice--
Sig916---I do love him. He was the love of my life. When he left I couldnt eat, sleep, concentrate-nothing! It was awful! I felt like I was living in a fog. I still do love him and I'm even willing to move out there to be with him. Regarding the wedding, that was discussed prior to him leaving but now that he has turned this cold shoulder on me, it is hard to feel like I used to.
I'll keep you all posted. Thank you.
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A
female
reader, Aunt Audrey +, writes (18 June 2008):
You need to ask yourself if he wants to talk about a possible reconsiliation if (a) you still love and want to be with him and (b) if you can cope with a long distance relationship or whether you might be better off calling it a day and moving on.
If you call it a day, ask him to stop calling or you will remain emotionally attached to him and it will be harder for you to get on in a new relationship.
Maybe he has had a change of heart and still wants you in his life, but you need to decide if it's what you want too. It's just a phone call, hear him out, you can tell him what you think and maybe put a closure to all this somehow.
Take care.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2008): In the beggining of the message, you said that you took peoples advice on here and stopped calling him, did you have feelings for him? People do change and maybe it took him to be away from you physically to realize how important you were in his life. It seems like he has regretted his past and now wants things to be better. Is it possible you could ever love him again like you once did? i also feel like your not telling the whole story, if you are dates to a wedding, you must keep in touch with him or give him enough hope for him to think you are there for him. the saddest thing in the world is loving someone, who use to love you. I say hear him out, its just a phone call, hes not asking to go back out, hes not asking to marry you, its a harmless phone call, love is an amazing thing! No matter what happens, in the end your going to do what you want to do. i say there is no hurt in listening to him.
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A
female
reader, Star_Fish +, writes (18 June 2008):
Cut your losses and end it for good! Take someone else to the wedding and cut off contact with him.
You even said "I don't think I can take it anymore."
Listen to your gut and end it. It'll feel like a weight was lifted.
Good Luck.
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