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I can't have sex because condoms turn me off!

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Question - (22 November 2009) 6 Answers - (Newest, 4 December 2009)
A male United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I Can't Have Sex Because Condoms Immediately Turn Me Off. What Do I Do? Cuz The Girl I Really Like Won't Go On The Pill. I've Tried To Have Sex But I Can't Because Of The Condom Issue So I'm A Virgin And I Just Want To Get It Over With. What Do I Do?

View related questions: condom, the pill

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A female reader, flagurl United States +, writes (4 December 2009):

First of all, you need to get educated about STD's. There's more reasons to use a condom than preventing pregnancy. Just because you think the girl is a "nice girl" doesn't mean she doesn't have an STD. Also, if you have cold sores, you can give it to someone genitally if you have oral sex. You don't need to have an outbreak in order to pass it on.

Yes, there are female condoms which the girl can use. These are easy to use and the girl can insert it up to several hours before hand if she wants to...or have some fun and you insert it into her. Female condoms are much like using a tampon, but has a ring which you squeeze in order to insert it. Once inside, the ring will hold it in place. It may take a couple of times to get used to it, but it's well worth it.

Check out www.basicstd.com/femalecondoms.html and also, check the condom demo page for instructions how to use male and female condoms.

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A female reader, k_c100 United Kingdom +, writes (22 November 2009):

k_c100 agony auntIf you dont want to use a condom and she wont go on the pill then you are both too immature and too irresponsible to have sex. End of story!

If you were mature enough and thought about this properly you would know that you need to use condoms to stop STD's and she needs to be on the pill to prevent her getting pregnant. It really is as simple as that - you should always have sex with both forms of protection until you have both been tested by a doctor for STD's, thats the only way of knowing you are both free from any diseases.

Wait until you are older to have sex - when you are mature enough to have sex then condoms wont be a problem for you because you will know how important they are and you will be able to stay aroused regardless of something so insignificant as a condom. You can get very thin ones that barely feel any different to not using a condom at all, so when you are actually ready for sex then this will be fine to use and not even an issue for you.

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A female reader, Jezebel United Kingdom +, writes (22 November 2009):

Jezebel agony auntAgree with first post, practice at home wearing a condom.

If you are a virgin how do you know that you hate condoms?

When you make love for the first time, you will be so excited, that you will forget your dread of wearing a condom.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2009):

First - Stop Writing In Initial Caps!!!! It's Annoying!!!

Second - You're just going to have to find the thinnest condom you can, and also grit your teeth and deal with this condom issue because you don't have any other responsible choice!

If you're looking for someone to say it's okay to have unprotected sex, then you've come to the wrong place! We all have to deal with this, pal, so get used to it!

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2009):

"I'm A Virgin And I Just Want To Get It Over With. What Do I Do?"

If you want to just get it over with then you dont want to for the right reasons.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2009):

Practise wanking at home with a condom so you get used to the feel of it x

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