A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Okay this is rather weird to me. I have been helping myself, sexually, since the age of 12. I have always liked it and i still do enjoy it, although its becoming a bit of a problem to me. I was still a virgin when i was 17 i slept with my ex boyfriend and because we both were new to sharing ourselves with each other sexually. I just could never cum with him. I thought it might just be cause its something new or he was just not doing something right. After he broke up with me long after i met a new guy. We date for a year, much longer then my ex and i did before we had sex, he is 12 years older then me. We have had sex now a hell of a lot of times, and i still cant cum, i have tried most things like a lot of 4play and start slowly to get everything going but yet i still cant cum, not with a vibrater not with a dildo, if i can remember correctly it happened once that i really reached a proper climax. Is there anything i should be worried about, or is there maybe something i can do to cum, i really would like to, for him not just myself. Also sometimes when i do help myself i tend to urinate, is that normal?
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broke up, dildo, my ex, orgasm, still a virgin Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionnot giving myself advice, an anonymous reader was looking for some advice, so i just updated some information thats all :)
A
female
reader, aunty_rach  +, writes (26 January 2009):
i'm confused. why are you giving yourself advise?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi there, i know its no fun at all its weird. Although what worked for us was if you really take it slow like as in really slow, tell your boyfriend how you feel and what you would like to do, not just for yourself but for him. Tell him you would like to take it as slow as possible and try as much as possible. At first play with yourself, if you feel cunfy doing it, ask him run his fingers all over you and play with you. If you would like ask him to 'tongue fuck' you that also works like a charm. Try not to have penetration what so ever, put nothing like as in nothing in your virgina.. licking, bitting, sucking, a lot of 4play, then if you are welling to place your vibrator close enough to your clit run it up and down, place it slightly in your asshole as he slides into your virgina, i am pretty sure then both of you will enjoy it.... It really does work.... P.S. I also found the asshole, vibrator, thing really gross, just relax and enjoy it, it really a feeling out of this work.... If you can try not to have sex in bed, try doing this on the floor, or on a table, a pool table works the best.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2009): I have the same problem with not being able to have an orgasm! I learned that most women do not have one strictly through sex. I can have one through clitoral stimulation so one night I decided to throw a vibrator into the mix. I had an orgasm but I had to tell my boyfriend to be still so I could actually reach an orgasm and that's no fun when you cant enjoy the feeling together! If you've found out any other ways please post!
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you so very much for all your help.... Last night was the best night ever! Thank you!!
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A
female
reader, michele21  +, writes (11 January 2009):
 its very normal to be like that when i first started having sex with guys i never would orgasm i mean i slept with probably about 4 people and i could never ever cum than i met this guy that was about 12yrs older and i just orgasmed like it was the best sex in the world too me i think a big part depends on if the man knows what he is doing too so you just have to try different positions different things and just find what works for you maybe your also trying to hard to orgasm thinking about it too much just relax and enjoy the feeling..
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A
female
reader, aunty_rach +, writes (11 January 2009):
don't worry, this is very common. alot of women find it hard to have an orgasm through penetrative sex. the best thing to do is teach him where you like to be touched and where it feels good for you. from foreplay a guy can learn alot and then this can lead to great sex. maybe even introduce a vibrator into the sex. you can get some which are like cock rings. they vibrate for him and then vibrate on you too. it will make it great for both of you. just experiment a little and you will find away of having a great orgasm.
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