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age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I just got my first retail position at a clothing store. I work in the kids dept. I know this isn't a r'ship question, but I was hoping for some help from people who have been in my shoes. I'm a very hard worker but the one thing I can't handle is rude customers. I work as a floor person so I'm terrified of a customer being rude or yelling/cursing at me. I've never done anything to elicit this sort of response from anyone (I'm super friendly and nice to everyone and I do a lot for people BUT I'm very sensitive). Is retail really that bad? My hiring managers seemed nice. But I'm just scared :( someone help! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Abella  +, writes (22 December 2011):
 Maybe Sales is not your thing?
But holding a job is important? Sales is not the only area where you can shine. But if you want to hold on to your sales job then you need a plan.
These mean people are using you as a punching bag, because they want to take their aggression out on the nearest available target. And you are handy and vulnerable because you are in retail.
Retail is a People Centric business. And you will get all sorts of people. Some clients are mean and nasty. Maybe you would be better selling in another business where the clients are more pleasant? If you enjoy selling?
But what if you are a person who is easily distressed, one who is anxious and sensitive when people are mean? (some people are) Then reconsider trying something that better suits you.
Where you have less people contact?
But what if making the sale Motivates you? Then you are half way these to becoming the Best Saleperson.
No matter how Obnoxious they or their children are.
Keep smiling at all times. But also recognise that their abuse is not personal. These people know nothing about you, they don't give you another thought about you, after they leave the store.
They are just rude and ignorant with a chip on their shoulders. Such rude ignorant people are usually highly insecure. And very susceptible to flattery. And the occasional sincerre compliment. Not too many compliments, but do find something real that you can say is nice, . Judiciously (apparently) sincere compliments can occasionaly work. Find something you can comment on favourably. But if you can't then stick to commenting on the weather.
Get your revenge by going out of your way to make them feel good, with the aim of getting them to part with twice what they intended to spend.
Watch the Rodeo drive shopping scenes in Pretty Woman. You make more sales by stepping out of your own body, into your role.
Come to work looking successful, dressed conservatively and looking fit and healthy. Practise allowing your face to light up with joy, to see the customer.
You are putting on a show. Neatly park you own ego out the back, and leave it there.
If you imagine that you have inadequacies then such inadequacies will not have relevance to making sales. So leave them home.
If you don't enjoy sales then yes, get out of retail.
You need to enjoy SELLING then selling is always going to be tough.
Whereas you may Enjoy actually making a Sale?
Then try to see if you can see it as a game you will win, if you play it right, then your sales will soar. And they can't touch your ego because it's parked out the back. You will have no need to be affected by bad feelings as what you believe are you inadequacies will be sitting in a drawer at home.
Disarm them with your smile.
Welcome them, like they are the most important clients of the day - where seeing them lights up your day. And welcome them, well groomed, smiling
welcomingly as BEST salesperson they
could possibly meet that day.
And if you don't have exactly what they want then assess what colors they are wearing and offer to have another check
of the stock. Bring out two pairs so the customer makes a choice.
Best Wishes for your future
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 December 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you to EVERYONE for all your helpful advice!!! I started my first few days this week and boy was it hard on my feet. I even had one customer complain about me to another employee because we didn't sell a certain shoe size she wanted. She goes "you know I work at Nordstrom, and I expect better customer service than this." I took it personally and got really upset. I already have thoughts of quitting. Should I keep going? Im so overwhelmed because I am not used to the environment nor the clothes so I get lost when customers ask me. Can I just say "sorry I just started I'll help you out the best I can?" :(
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female
reader, Abella +, writes (18 December 2011):
Along the way you will meet the most appalling revolting rude, disrespectful pathetic people who are impatient, cannot control their children and think a retail environment is the perfect place to start WWIII, AND who could easily pick a fight with a paper bag.
So how did I cope. First I refused to take anything they did or said personally. I remained a good, calm, capable person. What they dared to say to try to put me down, 'hey stupid over there, are you listening, I'm in a hurry you dumb bitch and I want service now!' Said at 5 minutes before closing time with three customers at the checkout.
Smile sweetly. Call for backup if someone else is available out back to help. Address the customer, 'Sir, a staff member will be with you shortly, as soon as my backup arrives, or after I have completed serving my customer'
Keep on smiling sweetly when you approach the customer, apologize for the delay, and then ask them what they requires.
But if they continue to be unreasonable then I use my Secret weapon. What's that? That is when I mentally put the custimer into a diaper (in my head) and continue to speak to them respectfully, but it puts a boost in my mind to realize that their peurile contempt and bad manners cannot get to me anymore.
If they get even more it becomes a soiled diaper
And make sure you say a nice farewell to diaper man or diaper women and thank them for their custom.
my two rules with customers are
1 my aim is to get their money, and get more than they intended to spend and get it with a smile
2 my other aim is inspired by the training films 'give the customer their pickle' see on the internet - there are multiples of this inspiring philosophy
I am not saying it is easy, it's not. But if it helps I will be happy for you
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female
reader, YouWish +, writes (17 December 2011):
 Oh! I forgot one more thing. You're in a kid's section, so you'll have an advantage. People, especially parents, are on better behavior around little kids. You give off an air of "librarian" or "teacher", so I think you'll benefit from a bit of extra civility. What mom wants their kids to watch them go off on a cursing tirade at someone, then go home and teach the little kid "please and thank you"?
Just a point to reassure you! You're in a bit of a calmer department. Not immune to bad behavior, but your customers might be more prone to censoring themselves!
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female
reader, YouWish +, writes (17 December 2011):
Hey! I worked retail for 6 years. Not only that, but it was at the Mall of America, which was the Ultimate Meat Grinder of nasty customers. I wanted to stick pins in my ears every time I heard Christmas music because I knew that it drew out the worst in people. I started out as a floor lackey and made it to store manager during that time.
I've been cursed out, spit on, had things thrown at me (a pack of batteries and a receipt from someone who tried to return a 7 year old VCR). I also broke up a couple of fights, stopped a woman from hitting her kid (that one broke my heart) and since it was the MOA, I dealt with screaming crowds and celebrities too.
First of all, don't be afraid. You're going to do just fine. You have to grow what I call "emotional armor". This means that you take absolutely nothing personal. If a customer cusses, it's not at *you*. If they act rude, it's not at you. It reflects what's in them, and them alone. Remember, they're not mad at you. They just can't handle their stress level.
Remember to mentally put your armor on every time you go into work. Their rudeness can't touch you if you do. If they get rude, be very calm and even with them. Ask them if they'd like to talk to a manager, and then pass the rude customer to them. That's what they get paid for!
Ask your store manager what the policy on handling irate/rude customers is. If a customer is unduly verbally abusive or screaming, you can call security. You should never have to take stuff like this alone. Sometimes, a very calm reminder can stop a tirade cold. One guy I dealt with who was just cursing up a storm I calmly mentioned that I'd hate to have to show the security camera footage to the manager and mall security. That stopped him.
Also, remember that it may feel like a bloodbath at Christmas, most people are good and decent. Your smile might make the difference for them. Try to "mirror" the customer, meaning if they're speaking quickly and tersely, answer them in kind.
You'll do fine. I often found out that when a customer got unruly at me, it was often other customers around telling him or her to shut the h*** up. heh. I was really good at diffusing irate customers. One was tearing me a new one because of the return policy (I was the assistant manager), and I answered with a smile "Would you feel better if you took me to the warehouse and beat the *** out of me?". He stopped and started laughing like crazy. He ended up buying another $2,000 worth of stuff and became a regular customer!
Just keep your head clear. Take nothing personally, and remember that most of your customers will be good and decent! You'll do just fine!
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2011): I worked in a bank and I tell you now there we occasions we were glad to be behind a glass screen! What you must always remember is that the customer is seeing you as the company. It is not personal and not an indication of how they view you, you are simply a face to the company and if they aren't happy you are their point of contact. It is very very rare to have abusive people but they do exist and their behaviour is more an indication of their poor manners that if they act aggressive they can't control it, my favourite tactic is to be sickly sweet and they often don't know how to handle it. Even if on the inside you are squirming just have some satisfaction in making them feel uncomfortable because the rare ones who get angry are looking for conflict and when you act completely ignorant of their rudeness and carry on being kind then it diffuses them quickly. I can't imagine in a children's dept. you are going to meet any raving looneys, you will certainly have a share of difficult customers but as long as you remain professional, apologise on behalf of the company (as its the company, not you, who needs to be sorry) and then refer them to a supervisor or your manager. Should you continue to have any issues you should raise these with your manager and they should go over what they expect of you and how they want you to respond. Overall you will have pleasant customers much more than a rude one, so don't worry yourself over this. Enjoy meeting the new colleagues you will be working with and try and enjoy yourself. You'll probably have a good laugh with the people you work with once you get familiar with the job! X
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (17 December 2011):
 In retail, you've to to be icky-nice ALL THE TIME!!!! .... and, you have to be accomodating EVEN WHEN A CUSTOMER IS "WRONG" (It's NOT really true that "the Customer is ALWAYS right...")....That said, learn to steel yourself to some Customers who will be obnoxious, difficult and/or downright unpleasant. Remember that THEY ARE the "reason" for your job... AND, that your job is to accomodate them.....I recommend that you get a copy of the book, "How to Win Friends and Influence People" .... and read it... EVERY SIX MONTHS or so... until you know it by heart. It is filled with lots of helpful ideas that address those types of problems and difficulties that you are likely to face every day....Good luck....
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2011): If you encounter a rude customer just apologize and ask if they would like to speak to a manager. That's what I always do. I worked at a post office and people are really rude about their mail sometimes. Just keep smiling no matter how rude they are, sometimes they even feel bad about being rude to you. Don't be scared and I wish you luck! :) You'll be fine.
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2011): First of all, congratulations on landing your first position! But you know, you have nothing to be afraid of. I too have heard all the horror stories of working in retail; I can imagine how that could make you feel more than a bit nervous, particularly since you haven't had much personal experience in the role. Think about it logically though: as you said, you've never done anything to deserve abusive behaviour from customers. You work in the children's department - would it be fair to assume you'd be less likely to encounter hostile customers there? And from your hiring managers down to your coworkers, you aren't alone (should anything ever happen).Let's say, for argument's sake, that you do encounter an aggressive customer at some point. The unfortunate fact of the matter is that there are indeed a great deal of rude people in the world; many will try to pick a fight with you - verbal or otherwise - even when you don't deserve it. But you have to be brave. The way I've learnt to deal with such incidents (because I've had to face a fair few...) is to try to defuse the situation as much as possible. Stay calm, maintain non-confrontational eye contact, keep your voice steady and explain reasonably. Don't let them see you're frightened, and don't lose your temper. When someone yells and/or curses at you, the temptation is to respond in kind - but of course that only succeeds in making it worse!It really does depend on the scenario. What you must learn, not just for working in retail but for getting by in the world, is to grow a thicker skin. I tell you from personal experience, it can be done. I was so incredibly thin-skinned when I was younger... someone only had to look at me with hostility and I'd want to cry haha. But with age and experience you do learn how to deal with difficult and bullisome people. When you encounter such behaviour, remember that by standing up to it you're getting stronger every time. You might feel like a kitten now, but it's only a matter of time before you'll look in the mirror and see a little lioness instead! :) Good luck and take care x
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2011): No one needs to take abuse. If someone approaches you, just say let me get my Manager.
Also speak to your Manager about what would be the best thing to do in such a situation.
You just started a new job, you have no idea what store policy is and asking is more than okay. It shows you are proactive and want to be prepared.
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