A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:HiSo me and my ex were broken up for a year now. NO contact at all. I loved him, and I knew he loved me, but there were family issues and I think me, being lile overly jealous at times (he was too tho) made him leave me. Problem is. I have completely changed my life since than. I moved away from him (40miles), I have no contact with his family or friends, I have new friends, new job, new place to live .. .my life is all new. I am enjoying things I do with my friends and I am also happy at my new job and stuff, BUT ... I cant forget him, I cant stop thinking of him. There are times I cry myself to sleep nite after nite. I am not sure what to do anymore.I have also a horrible luck with men. Everytime I meet someone he either wants to sleep with me only, or he would wanna be with me, but I am not interested in him at all....or if it does work out between both of us and we both like each other ... there is always something in the way that just ruins it. It ahs been like this for the past 27 years and the only luck I had was my ex. I never had a relationship before I met him.I just feel horrible. Not sure what to do, where to turn to. I was even thinking of going to get some meds for my depressions, but maybe its just because I am giving up on myself. I dont believe that I can make anyone happy anymore, because the one I gave everything to, left me for nothing.People tell me I am georgeous. Blonde,blue eyes, hourglass body and still I am unhappy and I hate my body. I use to be fat when younger and my family use to tell me "Oh you are fat, no one will ever want you if you are not skinny" ... or the worst one i got was " GOD GAVE YOU SUCH A BEAUTIFUL FACE, WITH SUCH A HIDIOUS BODY" And after I dropped 60poiunds and I am an average girl w a lil bootie and tiny waist I still feel ugly and fat next to all the other skinny girls and I keep thinking .... I am fat , thats why no one will ever want me !I am just very unhappy and I am not sure where to turn to. If I talk to my close friends about this, they say I am crazy cause I am not fat ... but they dont understand that I do feel fat no matter what I look to them. Please help me out here ... I am starting to be desperate!thank you
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female
reader, Befuddled1  +, writes (26 July 2009):
 Hi, I too suffer from low esteem despite apparently not being considered as hideous by others. It stems from childhood and it is very difficult to have a functional relationship when you feel jealous of and threatened by other women. It is hard but I have found that it is important to fill your life with things that make you happy... Good job, studies, friends, family, sports. Look as good as you can and try to see other women as attractive but no more attractive than yourself. You will meet the right man, you will feel it.all the best honey x
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