A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have a step mother who was very abusive to me and really messed me up emotionally. When my father died she told me she never cared about him or me and up and moved and left me alone. Wouldn't give me any of my dads belonginngs or ashes. I am an adult now but she did a lot of horrible things to me in the past that I have not seem to really get over. I have always been weary of getting mental help. Will a psychiatrist be able to help me with these issues? Does anyone have their own experiences (good or bad) that they can share with me? Thank you for your help Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2015): A counsellor would help..someone you talk to..you dont need a psychiatris because you are not mentally ill,just emotionally drained.Firstly you mustve lozt your mother and that is quite a bereavement .This is extremely hard to deal with. Everyone finds it very upsetting regardless of the strength of the relationship because she is usually the person who bore you and brought you into the world. As most of the grief woukd have been expected to surround her husband,your dad, i expect you were largely left to deal with your own feelings alone as not every one gets counselling unless they ask for it..but even with counselling it is a big loss.Your dad probably thought that you were at a disadvantage in not having a mother and he presumably remarried as soon as he could but he could have had no way of knowing that your step mother was abusive unless he saw it for himself.It sounds as though the step mother took over regarding the disposal of the shea but it is possible that your dad and her had previously discussed this in one of their closer moments and she may have duly scattered them at the place and season.Neither of your parents would have wanted you to carry the burden of grief forever and counselling is one of the ways you can talk through things and lighten the load.You can also discuss your feelings about any future or past interactions with the step mum .Now that you are an adult you need to feel that you control your own destiny and as most of these childhood events were out of your control a counsellor can help you to reassert your right to chose your pathways for the future without interference from others. I am assuming you still get depressed by events and that is hardly surprising considering that you went through such a lot.Labels are easy to stick on people but the truth is that few of us could cope with these kind of tragedies so young and you may find that your reactions are far more normal than you realise.Its good that you want to get help.You can ask your doctor for a referral for grief counselling and early childhood trauma.
A
male
reader, Garbo +, writes (16 September 2015):
 Psychiatrists privide medical treatments for patients who have a chemical imbalance in their brains. You haven't been diagnosed with anything yet, so you don't need a psychiatrist. You need a psychologist so that you can get an evaluation as to whether your condition requires a behavioral modification therapy (psychological help) or a medical therapy (psychiatry). Your general health doctor can help you find a psychologist.
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