A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Hi all, please help me in this issue, i hate the partner/lovers changing girls, I had no girl friend or sex in life, i used to watch a girl but no use, now i m arranged married person but after few years i came to know my wife had 2 bfs but not sex but the thing is now I m unable to digest her past with bf events i m really going through the pain, i can't feel peace in mind also we have been arguing regarding this and I want forgive her and I want to live happy and peaceful life with her but not able to make out can you please suggest me what to do?
View related questions:
her past Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 December 2010): You need to appreciate the fact that she told you about her past. Wwhat if she had been laid and didn't tell you and lead you to believe that she never knew anyone else before? How would that make you feel? At least she was honest, besides she did not have sex!!!
I guess being from a different culture makes a big difference ... I guess you would never consider marrying my wife if you knew about her past, lol.
A
male
reader, Odds  +, writes (21 December 2010):
 Hey, could be worse. You could live in America. Here, the concern would be that she's slept with five, ten, twenty guys (or more) before us, instead of just having dated two guys. Not even counting single mothers, STD's, or "technical virgins."
I understand that you're concerned she may have feelings for them. Chances are very good that she does not. Consider what she's done right - she's saved herself for marriage, and the only thing she's done is meet two other decent men before she met you. Consider it a good thing that she's only dated decent guys, and that she remaind a virgin even then.
It's good that you want to forgive her and live happily, but the best way to do that is to focus on the good, the here and now. This is not a case of "Those other men made me what I am today," this is a case of "I remained faithful and true to myself even when I met other guys."
Marry her and be good to her. Good luck.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2010): Forgive her for what? Having 2 boyfriends? That's ridiculous.
...............................
A
female
reader, DenimandLace44 +, writes (21 December 2010):
 Sometimes we expect certain things to be a certain way. It throws us for a loop when we find out they were different than we had imagined. Here is a link to one of the best articles on this site about this subject. Please read it, I think it will help you.
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/retrograde-jealousy.html
...............................
|
