A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes: Hi everyone. I am in middle school and about to go into highschool. I am having trouble finding where I fit in. I am costantly changing what I like and my look and I can't find it. I find it very hard to find where I belong. Does anyone have any advice for me? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2011): wow, this brought back a flood of memories!
First, quit trying to change the outside of you and look around and see what you need to change. In my case it was the kids I was hanging around with. I realized that I was hanging with a crowd that wasn't bad, but they were not going anywhere. Kind of the quite kids, lost in the middle of the pack. I was the one they looked up to, but it was a really mild thing... but they were plain... plain... plain.
I had zero hobbies, no extra activities... school and go home.
I looked around and found something that interested me, in my case it was stage craft... building sets, doing the lights and sound. I was terrified of acting, so there was ZERO chance I'd ever get on stage in front of people, but planning how to get stuff done, doing it and being integral to making the show go on was a blast! As part of the process I made dozens of freinds that are still freinds to this day (and I've now been out of school longer than I was in school...so that says something!).
Go seek where you fit, and quit trying to make yourself fit in a hole that's not a fit...
A
female
reader, xkatx +, writes (2 February 2011):
Its good if you have real friends to count on and help you see who you are. But before you get others to help you see who you are, you need to see who you are, its ok to constantly change your mind on how your looks, your interestes, and everyhing, its normal actually, i deal with it myself. I like things just like everyone else does, and then ill change sides of me and like things that other people wouldnt, even with music, cars, life styles, its like two people are morphing into one person, but its not a bad thing. Im a sophomore in highschool, freshman year i was really scared i wouldnt meet new people and wouldnt find myself, but all i can say is act however you want to act, be whoever you want to be, even if you change sometimes, its normal, people change, sometimes changing alot is what helps you see who you really are and what you like.
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A
female
reader, blondebombshell +, writes (2 February 2011):
thats a natural part of being a teenager. finding who you are and trying out new things. :)it is normal to feel like you dont fit in anywhere, everyone feels like that even if they don't show it, it is all part of being human, especially when you are in your teens.the best thing i can say is, be yourself and so what if your style changes frequently? you will find what is best for you and stick with it. just find a bunch or maybe just 1 or 2 friends that will be with you no matter what you look like or what you style in music is and everything will me much easier :) I hope that helps :)
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