A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I met this guy a year ago and started seeing him at work every day. I like to flirt and he was receptive and flirted back with me. He started getting me little gifts every once in a while and acting interested, but sometimes he didn't seem into me at all, you know? After a little bit, I figured he was never going to leave his girlfriend so I stopped trying to get his attention but stayed his friend. He kept acting like we were flirting and would do all the same stuff. Finally, he got a different job and left, but we kept in touch via email and would go out and do things. He got really weird and stopped contacting me for a long time. I emailed him and kept asking him if he wanted to go do stuff, but he would dodge the question and never go do stuff with me. Now he emails me back but is very cold. He isn't nearly as flirtatious or complimentary as he used to be. Sometimes it seems like he's writing me because he feels obligated to. I tried to tell him about the other guys I date, but he just brushes them off like he knows he's better than them. He fascinates me.Does he like me? Is he playing games with me?
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2009): He has a girlfriend, he is in a committed relationship, he has never asked you out on a date. He thinks of you as a friend, he may be keeping you on a string in case he needs a booty call if he and his girl break up....
I don't know what you see that is so fascinating in a guy you have known for a year and he hasn't once asked you out.
When I first started dating my ex boyfriend of two years, there was this girl who kept contacting him after he met her and her two daughters broke down in the car on the side of the rode. He played good Samaritan and took them home....He is a real handsome guy and he is used to lots of female attention and he likes women and likes having them as friends. For a little while he hung out with her a couple of times when she dropped in on him at home and he may have gone to her house once for dinner or something, but we started to date and as we got more serious, he would never or rarely answer her emails, and when she would call him he would talk to her on the phone and she would sometimes keep him on for a half hour talking about her work or whatever. All I can tell you is that eventually, he got annoyed, and when we ran into her once on the road at a stop light she was next to us, he ducked down in the car (he was the passenger) One time she called him when he was with me out of town at a hotel in the evening and he told her that we were still together and she started saying a bunch of stuff and he told her right in front of me to "loose his phone number". She chased him for a year, and by that I mean she played the role of friend and he never initiated anything with her, but was always polite to her when she contacted him, he never asked her out on a date, he never really told her he had a girlfriend because he wasn't trying to date her and didn't think it was any of her business, especially since she was sort of stalkerish, so finally he got mean when she got put out that he wasn't returning her calls and emails fast enough or at all for that matter.
What I am trying to tell you is it probably wouldn't matter whether or not this guy had a girlfriend, he simply is not into you at all. He isn't a jerk, he likes you somewhat, but that is about as far as this thing will ever go. It's been a year, give it up. Sorry if that is not what you wanted to hear.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2009): He is playing gamezs. there is nothing to figuiure out. Would you treat someone you fancied thisway? He obviously has other things that keep his mind busy, out of sight out of mind with this guy. Theres nothing worthwhile here unless you share a life changing moment with him
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A
female
reader, starrbaby +, writes (12 December 2009):
 Not to be harsh or insensitive but no girl, I don't think he likes you ANYMORE. I think he did but not now. And yes it seems like he's playing. Instead of being straight up, which you deserve, he's seems like one of those that is dropping hints and has no idea why you're not taking them at face value. I would suggest not contacting him for any reason and for sure, not trying to make him jealous about other guys because he knows that's what you're doing and you're really totally into him. Quit being so readily available and over eager. If he doesn't respond than you haven't lost anything. RIGHT?
-Starr
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