A
female
age
41-50,
*elly TT
writes: My husband and I have been married for 1 year, but have been together a total of 5 years. I feel like sometimes maybe he is not completely over his ex-girlfriend, mother of his 14 year old son. I really think it might be because I am insecure in myself, and she is like PERFECT! She has the perfect body, hair face, EVERYTHING! They were together since high school and she was the only other girlfriend besides me. He tells me he is completely over her and that if they didn't have a kid together, she wouldn't even be a part of his life. Sometimes, it seems my husband likes to listen to "depressing music about having your heart broken" and he has this look on his face like he is thinking about something. So, one day I asked him why he likes songs like that. He said because he can relate. So, of course being the instigator that I can be sometimes, I asked him why he would want to listen to music like that, reminding him of having his heart broken by her. He says that's not what he meant and he doesn't think of her, he can just relate to the lyrics. I kind of think that it's the same thing, but he thinks I am crazy. He has done a lot for me, so I am really confused about why I am thinking this way, or even if I should be thinking this way. Like I said, I think maybe it's just because this girl is so beautiful and perfect and I compare myself to her. But I just wanted to get another opinion.
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ex girlfriend, his ex, insecure Reply to this Question Share |
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female
reader, Kelly TT +, writes (15 April 2009):
Kelly TT is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks SyferFire. You realy don't know how much better you have made me feel. That's actually almost the same things he would tell me, so you really put a HUGE SMILE on my face!! Thanks a million!! :)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2009): Well.. Ideally yes, he shouldn't be listening to that. I understand why it bothers you. That's the type of stuff people with their hearts STILL broken or damaged listen to.Still, relating to the lyrics, and somehow contemplating about his ex, are two different things. He could just be reminiscing on what it felt like to be hurt, and not necessarily anything else. If he treats you well, and everything else is cool..I'd suggest you ease up on him a lil bit. Even if he isn't completely over her on all levels (she is the mother of his child, and its sounds like they were together a long time) the fact remains he is still with you.
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