A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have dated this guy about four years ago and we broke up mainly because he was to attached and never gave me space. He is a very good man and all but the one thing that turned me off was his looks he was not attractive at all. But everything else about him was perfect. He kept a job as a matter of fact he had two jobs which he still has. He never cheated or anything we just got back in touch and i really missed him but now he is in a relationship with someone else would I be wrong to get him back because I know I can this will be my husband i just know it so what should I do leave him in his relationship with someone who he does not love or get him back and marry him. I need help....
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell the thing about it is that he is not happy with her at all. We have talked about this over and over. She can have him but he dosent want her his heart is with but. I can tell everyone this I though about it and I dont want him I couldnt do it then and I will not do it now I told him that we can be friends and nothing more because I need my space...
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2010): Isn't he better off with someone who does find him attractive? If he is the love of your life and you know you want him (even though its odd as you dont find him attractive) you could always try and get him back, but you should leave him so time to be alone for now. If it's meant to be it will happen.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2010): This is just a case of there not being anyone else out there at the moment that you want. You didn't want your boyfriend at the time because he was too possessive and ugly and none of that has changed. Please leave the couple alone because I am currently on the receiving end of something similar and it is very hard. These things are very difficult and it is quite likely that your old boyfriend unless he is really in love with his new girlfriend will be in touch so if you do go down this route make sure that you really do want him and that he will not be just killing time until you find someone you like better.
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2010): You snooze, you lose. Get over it and move on. Don't be a homewrecker, convincing yourself he doesn't love her. Yes, you can mess with his head and tempt him to screw up his relationship with her, because he's a guy, and guys can be easily tempted, but don't be evil, like that. You're obviously jealous that you see he's happy with her, so you want to steal him away, pretending that you're good for him. You're not good for him, though, four years after leaving him because of your conceit. Now, the same conceit drives you to want to ruin what he has going with this other woman. Grow up, lady, and grab a life, but somewhere else. You must be a little dense in the head to be chasing someone you got rid of a long time ago.
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A
female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (19 February 2010):
 He wasnt good enough when you had him... only now that he has someone else you find him attractive??
Leave him alone, let him be happy with his new life. Time for you to find someone that suits you better.
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A
female
reader, shnookims +, writes (19 February 2010):
 Leave him alone to be happy with his new girlfriend! Maybe she can look past his looks and love him for his good character traits. Did you ever think to yourself that maybe he was so clingy because he felt insecure because of the fact that you never made him feel like he was worth anything?
Go find an attractive man, who has no insecurities!
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (19 February 2010):
 Leave him alone, it seems to me you didnt want him, dumped him four years ago, tried to find somebody better looking, found that you couldn't and decided to go pick up where you left off. Sadly for you, you neglected to consider the fact he may have moved on with his life during those four years when you didn't.
People are not things, you cant just decide to throw one away because you dont like the look of it, and then, after somebody else decides they do like the look of it try and take it back.
You just can't do that!
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2010): Well, you have said that you broke because he didn't give you enough space and you didn't find him attractive. So why would you want him back?
Leave him to be happy with his new girl friend and find someone that suits you better.
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