A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:How am i supposed to get out of this dilemma, my best mate and I had a disagreement that resulted in us falling out. After a few weeks we still had not resolved the issue. Next thing I know his girlfriend is at my house trying to get us to sort it out, one second we are sat there chatting and the next we was kissing, ripping each others clothes off, she was really horny and so was I. She ended up staying the night. When I woke she had already left.I rang her later that day and she said although it was good it must never happen again and we won't ever mention it, I totaly agreed. I then got in touch with my mate and said we had been silly falling out and can we be mates again? He was glad I called.After about a month or so who but again comes to my house again but his girlfriend, to tell me she`s having my baby and there is no mix up as she and my mate were not having sex at the time. She said she was keeping the baby and happy to be with me, how the hell did I let this happen, how could I have betrayed my best friend like that? I dont even like her in that way, it was a moment of madness, vunerability and she took advantage of the situation.It is starting to affect me, i cant eat, sleep or concentrate. I told her I will be in touch as soon as I have had time to think, truth is I don't want to think...
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2009): Holy shit man, you screwed up :O
But it happens. Your best friend might be your ex best friend and you might not have any close friends in the future... but hey, at least you have passed your genes on!
Seriously, speak to the friend and be honest no matter what the consequences... or actually, wait, if you haven't talked to him yet....... you've already fucked everything up so you stand nothing to lose. Don't tell him anything! Wait till the baby's out just to see his face and rage! :D This is what best friends are for!
- your soul mate
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 July 2009): what a good friend you have turned put to be. stop making excuses and blaming this woman only. she did not force you. what i think may have happened is this- you got one over your best friend by doing his girlfriend. now he will see you for what you really are. i am hoping that you and this woman do not expect to pass off this child as your friends. now that will be the ultimate betrayal. you need to be a man about this situation you have created and talk to your friend. tell him you are sorry and that you messed up. as for the this woman tell her to get an abortion. and fast! it is clear you are not ready to be a father.
"........ dont even like her in that way, it was a moment of madness, vunerability and she took advantage of the situation." i think you need to re evaluate this sentence. who is fooling who here?
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A
female
reader, Libra1963  +, writes (26 July 2009):
 What a dilemma you're in. Firstly you need to speak to this girl further. Has she been seeing anyone else apart from you?Its really difficult as it sounds like she has made up her mind about keeping it. I can understand how confused you must feel - it must be awful for you. I have to tap your knuckles as I am sure you must have known about the birds and the bees.You are old enough to face the responsibility but I would try and be honest with your mate before she does. It may not be your child. At the moment you are only going by what she is saying. There is not anything else you can do to prove until the child is born. Be honest with your mate. He will hate you and be hurt and confused but in time if he is a true mate he will come round particularly as you were honest in the first place.If it does not work out with him, how will you feel seeeing him him and the girl in the same area wit your child. They may salvage their relationship. It does not sound as though you have any true feelings for her. If it does not work out with your mate and her - will you take her on.Its a confusing position you are in and the trouble is that you are going to have to wait a few months for the real answers. Sorry I could not be more help.
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