A
female
age
41-50,
*itris
writes:Very recently began dating/seeing this guy I met through a friend. He's fantastic, however I need help keeping my mind off of him and not contacting him and giving him some space right now. He very recently lost someone very close to him and is putting on quite the brave front. I know he needs and wants time to himself, and I hate knowing he's so sad and there's nothing I can do to help so I've been offering help and trying to cheer him up, now I feel I'm just being a pest and possibly jeopardizing the chance I have of not just being a 'distraction' for him. I have alot of free time right now and keep finding myself wanting to call him or go see him...any ideas to keep me from that or any advice at all on this situation would be helpfull. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, citris +, writes (21 March 2008):
citris is verified as being by the original poster of the question I'm pretty sure the only thing going on is that he's depressed about his family member dying. I haven't seen him since before the funeral, he's kinda been holing himself up at home and not wanting to go anywhere, see anyone or do anything. I guess best thing to do is keep myself busy and wait for him to contact me...right?
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2008): If he told you he needs time to himself respect that. But keep in mind there may be something else going on so respect yourself as well. In either case the right thing to do is to give him the 'space' he asked for. I need space is code for leave me alone- possibly forever.
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A
female
reader, X-Imi-X  +, writes (21 March 2008):
 Thats tough! Well look at it like this, if you lost someone close to you and very terribly upsett would you want your boyfriend around you all the time? would he get annoying? or would he be a shoulder to cry on...? lads take it more sensitively when someone dies (even though the dont show it) because they feel they cant cry over it, so they keep it all bottled up and make them self depressed! I would go over and show a friendly face to keep his mind of you know who, maybe take him out somewhere... maybe a stroll along the beach where he can propperly let his feelings out! Hope this helped! X-Imi-X
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