A
female
age
22-25,
*erryplant
writes:My boyfriend has snap chat. My friend "let's call her C." added him on Snapchat when we first met him. C. seems to have a problem with me getting in a relationship. Every time I Do, she breaks us up by speaking to my boyfriends and making bad rumours up about me. I've asked him to delete her as she will try and break us up. However he hasn't and I don't know what to do. I'm scared to post any pictures with him because C. will start texting him and saying bad things about me. I feel rude asking him for his snap chat password.What should i Do?Should I break up with him?
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (15 June 2017):
 Honestly I think you should not have her as a friend any more, because she is not a true friend, it is clear she is jealous off you. You don't have the right to tell your boyfriend who he can be friends with so maybe he hasn't deleted her because he doesn't like to be told what to do, talk to him and if he takes your so called friends side then its best to not have him in your life either. As you get older you will realize that it is not the way friends should treat you.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2017): If your boyfriends have all believed C over YOU, then what kind of boyfriends were they anyway?Not very good boyfriends to take her word OVER their own girlfriend!!!So, be glad you lost them.Now, it's time to lose this so called "friend." Friends do not do this to other friends. C has some serious problems with self esteem and self worth. She bases her own importance on bringing down others. FRIENDS, of all people! What a shitty human being! She must be a pretty miserable person!! Not somebody you would want as a friend.Have you explained to your boyfriend what C has a history of doing? And that she might try to do the same thing to you? It seems to me she is maybe out to try to get your boyfriend for herself. I do think that if your boyfriend really cared about you, he would delete her from Snapchat on his own. Or maybe he does not see her in the same way you do and does not feel a need to delete her?It is hard to try to control who your boyfriend talks to on these apps. Trust me, these apps can be the death of relationships. Facebook, Snapchat etc. Just way too many people who are readily available to chat with. This causes problems. Lots of them. I see your point in wanting him to delete her. You are just trying to protect your relationship. I would want the same thing. And I would probably ask my BF to delete her too. And I would be pissed if he didn't. It would make me feel like he liked her more than me. Or chose her over me by keeping her.There is nothing you can do at this point. Just be honest. Tell your boyfriend how it makes you feel if he keeps her on his friends list. And that you are not very happy with his decision. Then try to distance yourself from him. See if he comes back to you. Never chase a guy or force him to do things. They hate being whipped. So, the best strategy is to tell him to do whatever he wants and then start to become unavailable to him. I mean distance yourself. Go out with friends. Do your thing. Live your life. And do not include him. He will see you are not happy with him. And if he cares, he will come back and ask you what is going on. If he sees how much this bugs you, then he should delete her. If not, keep distancing yourself. Because he really is not the one for you.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2017): Aaaah. The old Love triangle! The pyramid with the eye at the top. Your boyfriend is below the pyramid the C. girl aquaintance is inside at the bottom and you're hovering above. You see what's going on and so do we, the people you want help from. I can see, that you need out of this turmoil and then you can explore the higher things outside of this Love triangle you're involved in, but never wanted or desired.Think bigger!There's more to life than Love triangles!?
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (3 June 2017):
 I think instead of breaking up with your BF you should distance yourself from this "friend" C. She doesn't SOUND like a friend at all. And I would tell her EXACTLY why you can't be friends anymore. That her destructive behavior when YOU date someone is just not something you WANT in your life, you don't need the lies or the drama.
Should you ask him for his password? NO! who he talks to is actually NOT your business to decide. IF he CHOOSES to listen to HER over you, then well, he isn't a very good BF.
Would you want HIM to tell you who you can talk to and whom you can't? I bet not.
I think you are considering breaking up before HE dumps you over lies from C... But really HOW can you "live" your life if you let HER (C) control WHAT you do? Whom you date?
Instead, "DUMP" C and REMOVE her from Snapchat, and tell your BF about and why. Maybe if he is any kind of SMART he will remove her on his own. Or maybe he won't and THAT is up to him.
You can't CONTROL what your BF hears about you. All you can do is BE you and be open to answering any questions a BF might have, like, is it true you did XYZ? (whatever gossip C likes to spread).
As a GF/partner you have NO right to demand his password so you can check up on him or delete people from his snap chat (or whatever app), are you high? Think about it. Would YOU want a partner to do that to you?
YOU are the one keeping C in your life even though she tries to "ruin" it...
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2017): If he has not the decency to respect your valid request, after all the lies she has spread, and all the hurt she has inflicted on you then he is not respecting you.Let him have C. He will discover the error of his ways when C. decides to disrespect him. Some girls, C. Included, seem so insecure and so lacking in any kind of ethical behavior that they derive maximum satisfaction from breaking up other girl's relationships.Nice girls soon see how they operate and stay away from them. You know you deserve better than this from a boyfriend.Find a nicer boyfriend who will not disrespect you in this way
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