A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My husband and I have been married for 9 years. We have been having problems for a while(Nov). He was laid off work and I thought I did all the supportive things to help him. He also had a part time job at a department store which he still has. Since working there he changed, staying out till 5am in the morning, driving home drunk etc. I told him it wasn;t acceptable. I know he works with mainly younger women and have often thought something may be going on or he is tempted. He has made no attempt to look for other work and puts this part time job before me and the kids. I have a small business which could be potentially successful for us but he shows no ambition or interest. I have tried talking to him but I get nothing. Finally on Tuesday I asked him to leave as all he says he is not happy. He didn't object and was gone within 10 minutes. He has made no contact with me or to check on the children. I was hoping that this would be a wake up call for him to talk to me. Now I am thinking he doesn't want me anymore and that he wants to be single with no responsibilities like his co-workers.I am left feeling lost and hurt and I don't know what to think.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 March 2009): He lost his full time job and probably lost his manhood. I'm not defending his drunk driving & staying out but I think that's just him masking his pain and insecurities. It's hard for a man in be in a position were he can't provide for his family. Yes, you've tried to be supportive during his hard times but it doesn't make a difference if he's still unemployed. You say he's stopped looking, well a lot of people do coz they try, and try, and see nothing coming.
Get your man back, don't lose him over this. When he comes back, seek some counselling or help.
He probably feels like he is worthless to you and the kids, and then you asking him to leave probably confirmed it for him.
Good luck.
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