A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am in a relationship with this pretty girl for the last 2 years and we are having great loving and sexual relationship . Recently, I asked her to wear very tight pent and jeans in home so that her big tits and butt become obvious for me . She replied with big laugh saying it was cheap stuff coming from my side. Ever since I said that thing, now I can't make contact with her eyes and I always feel shy. Was that a really cheap stuff? How should I get rid of my shyness which has been triggered by her big laugh? Please Dear Cupid, help me on this! Thanks!
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female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (28 October 2011):
 You'd probably get over the 'shyness' sooner if you thought about how SHE might have felt instead of focussing only on yourself.
'I asked her to wear very tight pent and jeans in home so that her big tits and butt become obvious for me'. If this is how you put it to her, then quite frankly you ought to be embarrassed.
Apart from this you may be a terrific boyfriend, but your request probably made your girlfriend feel like a piece of meat on display. She may be sensitive about 'her big tits' and your vulgar attempts to highlight them might have humiliated her. Kudos to her that she managed to turn it around on you.
Take a deep breath and give some thought to HER feelings. Then face the music and apologise. She might be more inclined to tend to your bruised ego if you tend to her's first.
A
male
reader, Red Green 0289  +, writes (28 October 2011):
Some women have no idea the damage they can do to their partners ego. You need to tell her exactly how what she said made you feel. TELL HER... just share your feelings, and don't accuse her, or make it about her... it's about you.It should go something like:When you ____ (did, said something) I felt ___.Simple, non-judgmental
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (27 October 2011):
 Well... you "tipped your hand" as to what you REALLY think of your G/F.... and she got offended AND called you on it. Probably the only thing you can do now is apologize.... AND, not with the routine wave-of-the-hand (and insincere) apology.... but you've to got really get down on your hands and knees and grovel!!!!BUT, the "upside" is that, if she accepts your apology, then you might get to resurrect a modicum of the relationship that you had with this girl before you opened your mouth!!!!Good luck.....
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A
female
reader, KittieS  +, writes (27 October 2011):
 Maybe the way you phrased it :)
Most women need to feel wooed most of the time, so "tits and arse" in a general conversation whilst not feeling remotely sexy might have made her feel a bit embarrassed or like she is just boobs and a bum to you.
Best thing to do in my opinon, tell her how great her body is all the time and when she does wear something tighter tell her how good she looks and how it makes you want her so much more - the old saying "flattery will get you everywhere" really does work on women, well it works on me, and it inspires me to look good for my boyfriend as much as possible!
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (27 October 2011):
 You have been with her for two years, you need to be able to look at her and talk to her. You can do it. Step out of your comfort zone and just talk to her about what happened and that you don't understand why she laughed at it. You enjoy her curves, and that was the entire point. If she doesn't not want to then that's ok, but you don't know how to react when she laughs at the idea.
The only reason to get over this "shyness" you currently experience is to gather up some courage and face her. Otherwise you will make the situation worse.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (27 October 2011):
 IT was mean of her to laugh at you but maybe it made her feel uncomfortable.
I can see why she would think it's cheap. She maybe thinks that all you see her as is tits and ass. and if that's how you phrased it yes I'd be a bit insulted.
My boyfriend likes me to dress sexy. I allow him to pick my clothes when we go out on date night. He gets minimal say on work clothing or errands or working around the house clothing and cold trumps sexy any day of the week.
If he came to me and said please wear xxxxx and show off your great tits and ass.... I'd think him shallow and crude. IF he came to me and said "Please wear xxxx for me as I think you are so beautiful when you dress that way and it makes me want you more than I already do" I would be way more receptive.
I think it's GREAT that you asked her to dress for you. IT shows you are comfortable with the relationship and that's GREAT.
I'm sorry she laughed... go to her and say "I'm sorry I presented it the wrong way, I don't think YOU are cheap nor is our relationship cheap. I think you are beautiful and sexy and I want to enjoy that aspect of you"... make she she knows ALL the things you appreciate about her... beauty, brains, sense of humor, etc....
if all you see her for (or if she thinks all you see her for) is tits and ass, then there actually is a problem.
Sometimes it's all in the presentation.
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