A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm 17 and a senior in high school. I have never gone out with anyone, and this doesnt help my confidence any. But my friends convinced me that I should ask out a girl that i talk to a lot and am very good friends with. She is in some of my classes and out of school activities. I didn't want to wait any longer, so I asked her out. I got rejected, and she said it was because i am a senior and will be going to college, and she isn't a senior. She is/was worried that when that time came, something would have to happen. College is a good 6 or so months away, and things can always change, but I had previously told her i would most likely be going out of state, but wasnt sure yet. She assured me that I was by no means the reason why she didnt wanna go out with me, but i'm still hurting. Some of my friends suggest i talk to her again and tell her that things can change, and that i could go to college here, so that we wouldn't need to break up. I really dont know what to do, can anyone please help?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2009): Thanks for all the suggestions. We weren't really talking for a few days, but I talked to her yesterday because we had a quartet to play in today, and I didn't want it to be awkward and what not, but today at the thing we played and then had dinner, and it seemed as if nothing had happened in the past week, so i guess that could be seen as a good thing. But the only thing i wanted to stay the same is our friendship, and it seems to be unharmed, so i feel much better about the whole thing. Thanks again for all the suggestions, they are much appreciated!!!
A
male
reader, RAINORFIRE +, writes (17 December 2009):
 AGZW is a pimp thats good advice lol thats probably why 90% say no because AGZW has all the girls
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A
female
reader, Angzw  +, writes (17 December 2009):
When you ask for a date with someone, dont make it a pressured thing or a serious thing. Just be relaxed and maybe say "hey, I know you already said you wouldn't date me but at least let's go out for an icecream just as friends... I need your advice on something important but I can't ask you here!!" Be smiling, funny, laugh a little. Maybe she will be curious because girls love to give advice. On the date when she asks what advice you needed just laugh and say, "I can only tell you on Saturday if you will walk with me at the park"!! (just examples of places). By your second date you would have spent enough time chatting with her for her to like you... Then when she asks again, the question is something like "how can I win the heart of somebody like you?!" just be relaxed, fun and dont act like you're in love with her. Talk to her like how you talk to your guy friends. At the end of the day, if a girl says no, its no big deal. By the time you finish college, 90% of all the girls you approach will say no to you. That's just life. But the "just friends" approach has worked for every generation. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Angzw +, writes (17 December 2009):
When you ask for a date with someone, dont make it a pressured thing or a serious thing. Just be relaxed and maybe say "hey, I know you already said you wouldn't date me but at least let's go out for an icecream just as friends... I need your advice on something important but I can't ask you here!!" Be smiling, funny, laugh a little. Maybe she will be curious because girls love to give advice. On the date when she asks what advice you needed just laugh and say, "I can only tell you on Saturday if you will walk with me at the park"!! (just examples of places). By your second date you would have spent enough time chatting with her for her to like you... Then when she asks again, the question is something like "how can I win the heart of somebody like you?!" just be relaxed, fun and dont act like you're in love with her. Talk to her like how you talk to your guy friends. At the end of the day, if a girl says no, its no big deal. By the time you finish college, 90% of all the girls you approach will say no to you. That's just life. But the "just friends" approach has worked for every generation. Good luck.
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (17 December 2009):
 Well, your friends might know, or she might have been trying to let your down gently.
Hard to say which it is. But rejection is part of life, you either get over it or stop living. Wouldn't recommend the last one.
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