A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: Afternoon aunts and uncles.I need some advice about a colleague of mine. Over the last few months she keeps talking about suicide and killing herself. She even asked what is the best way to kill yourself. At first I thought it was just attention seeking but now I'mnot so sure...She has become withdrawn and lost weight and what made me worry was I went over to talk to her and I noticed she was on the intenet googling suicide methods- she obviously saw me walk over and minimized the page.I know she feels a bit trapped at home because her and her mum don't get on and she failed her driving test again which she feels makes her a loser ...What do I do? Do I tell someone? I don't want to land her in it as she may actually do it if everyone knows. I have tried to speak to her but she doesn't really open up.Please advise.....
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female
reader, Myrrh +, writes (30 June 2010):
Hi. Try and meet up with her outside of work and have a chat. Shes very depressed and needs to speak to her doctor about it as soon as possible. Maybe as she cant drive, you could offer to go with her. It might be something as small as offering a lift to the doctor, that helps her on the road to recovery. When people are deeply depressed its a serious illness. And that illness often make it very difficult for sufferers to talk about it. Its not that they want to be aloof or distant. They simply lose the ability to put into words how they feel. So do talk and dont give up or be put off if she seems distant. Also, talk to a trusted co worker about your concerns for her. Between you, you might be able to think of a way of helping that wont involve the whole place knowing about her problem. And it relieves you of some of the burden of knowledge. But the fact that shes told you about it, is a sign thats shes trying to reach out for help. Let her know you are there for her and you will help, bless you x
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (30 June 2010):
Go to this site
http://www.samaritans.org/
and just have a read at what it can offer. I've been there before and it offers a lot of information about suicide, and not just for suicidal people. It can offer help for people who think that someone around them is suicide, like your co worker. It may well be worth getting into contact with them and seeing what they can offer. This is her cry for help, but like all people who have suicidal thoughts, she will be finding it hugely difficult to open up.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2010): Someone who talks about it, will eventually work up their 'nerve' and do it. I would take this seriously. That she has mentioned it to you is a cry for help. Look online or in your phone directory for a local crisis hotline. They have trained professional staff who can advise you. Do it now, you dont want to feel like you shouldve done something..good luck, mal
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A
female
reader, eneyesee +, writes (30 June 2010):
This is a tough one. Do you tell someone what you know and risk your friend hurting herself? Or do you stand back, do nothing and watch her life go down the pan?
Firstly, talk to her, tell her you're really worried she's going to hurt herself and that you really care about her. Sometimes just knowing someone cares is enough to stop this behaviour.
Be there for her if she wants to talk, and if it all gets too much for you (it can be a lot of weight on someones shoulders) confide in a family member of your that you trust, don't give any names just yet.
I can tell you're a great friend and you're just what this person needs right now. It's obvious they're feeling trapped at home, offer her a place to stay if it all gets too much. Make her realise she's not alone.
I hope this helps even a little,
Nic x
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