A
female
age
41-50,
*tweety78
writes:I have been dating this guy for six years now, we live together and he has been lying to me. He has been talking and texting other women. Comments like hey sexy, hey beautiful. We have been through this before twice already and I am wondering when is enough enough can a person ever change? How do I trust him? Will I ever be able to trust him. I really love this man with all my heart but I am tired of being hurt. When I confronted him about the things he got upset and said it was nothing just texting. So I asked him to go to his mother for a while. It has been almost two weeks he wants to come back, he says he wants to be with me and me only... but I am not sure what to do?
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female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (15 May 2009):
You need to decide that you don't want to be with him, that it was never going to happen and you are ready to move on.
THEN you can start getting over him.
Look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself that you are worth more than him and you are going to find a guy who will treat you as he should treat his wife and the mother of his children.
Sitting thinking about whether he's found a new girl to cheat on won't help you. You have to take control of your life and get it moving again.
Good Luck!! xx
A
female
reader, 4tweety78 +, writes (14 May 2009):
4tweety78 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionits been a month now since he went to his moms. in the beging he was call and txting me say he was sorry that he wanted to come back. the past two weeks i have not heard from him a txt call or anything. i want to no if he has moved on. i haven't, the girl tried taking me out to get my mind of it but i go right back to thinking of him again. i am still stuck on wondering whats going on. i cant explain why i am still thinking of this man who has lied to me so many times. i just dont want to see him with anybody else, it would hurt so bad. all i can see is him finding somebody else and having the family that i wanted with him
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (26 April 2009):
Well this is like pulling a wax strip off.
Only you can do it, and you just have to get on with it.
Go and put all his stuff in a bin bag, and put it in a cupboard.
Then you just have to make a call or whatever and tell him.
Call your girlfriends, tell them what's happened and get them to cheer you up after it's over.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, 4tweety78 +, writes (26 April 2009):
4tweety78 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you for all your advice. but, how do i let him go. he has been gone now for two weeks some of his belonging are still here. i do know that i need to let him go but part of me is still undecided. i just cant bring myself to say it i am so confuse please help me
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2009): Enough is enough, as you say you've been through this twice before, his walking all over you, his never going to change. Get on with your life get rid of him. I went through the same as you, and my ex just kept on cheating, it didn't matter how many times I caught him out. He always thought i'd never get rid of him, well he got that wrong and I did. I got to the point where I didn't even trust him when I could see him. I don't think your ever trust your one again. His still begging and crying for me to take him back, no way. Move on, you deserve better than him Good luck x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2009): i think maybe he sees this as harmless but the fact that you've stood your ground and asked him to leave should show him that it's really hurting you.
i can understand, i am in the same situation.
if you really feel he's worth it, maybe give him one more chance but i wouldn't let it go on anymore if he does it again.
just my personal opinion cos i know how hurtful it can be.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (23 April 2009):
The first or second time is enough. If you let it go on for years then you end up in love with them and tortured about the fact that he will NEVER change because he knows he can do what he likes, then say "he wants to be with me and me only" and you'll have him back.
Give him another chance if you want but the FIRST time he says ANYTHING inappropriate to another woman then you kick him out because you will have proof that he will NEVER change.
I wouldn't waste the time to give him that chance personally.
Good Luck!! xx
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