A
female
age
36-40,
*attooedStacy
writes:I am trying to get my former lover to leave his wife. Him and I had a fiery relationship for about 2 months while they were seperated and it was amazing. Him and I still talk a lot even though we know we shouldn't. I want him back dearly how should I approach this situation? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2008): Leave him/her alone. Two months of a relationship is no way to base what you want from him. Every relationship I have been in fizzles out of those first few months of wanting to eat each other alive and feel their skin under your tongue. Your former lovers life isn't worth ruining over your delusions.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 March 2008): Give him up, as I responded to your other post. He is an unstable wreck.
...............................
A
male
reader, Stroller  +, writes (16 March 2008):
 Regarding your follow-up:
Hmmmn... I'm unclear about your own marriage situation, but whatever.
I'm inclined to agree with you that he's made the wrong decision going back to a controlling wife that criticises him for everything, but it's his decision to make. There's no benefit to trying to change his mind, and there's no milage in crying over spilled milk. Forget him & move on!
...............................
A
male
reader, Stroller +, writes (16 March 2008):
You should just quit now. "Home-wreckers" don't win, and the guy has already made his decision when he went back to his wife.
There are extra-marital affairs which are justified, which are a symptom of a bad marriage that the involved party should leave, and good relationships can blossom from such affairs. But I would guess they're the exception, rather than the rule.
The guy has already made his decision when he went back to his wife - any further time you invest in him you're both going to regret. Don't cause yourself and others further unhappiness by pursuing this guy.
...............................
A
female
reader, TattooedStacy +, writes (16 March 2008):
TattooedStacy is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSo I wasn't sure how many words to put it. Here is the background. I married the wrong man for the wrong reasons... I found someone else who was the person I had wanted to be with.Him and I started a relationship in June of 07 and ended in Oct 07 with him going back to his wife. He would tell me how he was thinking of leaving for months but never knew if he would be able to. She is Japanese he is American. She would go on and on about how much she hated his tattoos, and motorcycles and dogs and the fact he was in the Navy (we are stationed in Japan). At first he was just a close friend of mine, and we were always attracted to each other but never said anything.Then, one day it all came out.At first it was just advice and as we hung out it became more. He asked me to move in with him after she had moved out and suggested I sell my car since he had a Jeep and two motorcycles.Then, he got into a motorcycle accident, after she walked in on us in their bed.... he then wanted "re-prioritized" his life. He wanted to think things through and make a decision.His wife went to Thialand for 2 weeks and he came right back to me for advice. I told him to leave her even if things didn't work out between him and I he would be happier in the end.After his wife came back we talked daily about everything (including my marriage).One day he stopped talking to and didn't for the next 5 months. He finally came up to me after he had been drinking and said, "I can't talk to you any more because if I do I will want to leave my wife again." I told him if thats the case he might as well leave now. I know their marriage is rocky and he would be better off (he has even admitted it not only to me but others). but he never seems to go anywhere. There is a lot more to this problem then stated here, so please if you want to know more or think you can help me message me...
...............................
|
