A
female
age
51-59,
*clyse
writes:My partner (of two years) and I are separated due to his new location of work place. He has been stationed in a far distance island since March 2018 where his ex-wife lives now. He is a dedicated medical practitioner undoubtedly. This time in his new work station, he involves very much in his work and environs such as having 12 working hour in a day thus often forgetting to communicate with me . His ex-wife is still much into him as they used to be together more than a decade. I understand from my partner that she keeps trying to get him back to her life.Jealousy is inevitable, I feel it but I can control myself with confident attitude. I’ve seen their public pictures together which shows their physical closeness in many events. I also read many news in local magazine or newspaper about their occasions together. At first, I felt really uneasy but I had no proof anything went wrong and he still communicates to me although the intensity is getting less. However, I start to lose my feeling towards him since I have done anew extreme sport activity which has changed my life. As a result, I don’t care much anymore if he is in touch with me (or not). Whenever I see new public pictures of them together, it doesn’t give any jealousy feeling like before. I surrender and give up with whatever will happen in the future. Some moment ago, I decided to check on him whether he is still on the same page and wish to be together again in the future. I don’t know what his answer yet, I am waiting! His assignment in the far distance island will end in October 2018. It seems I am fighting within me whether I need to lose my feeling towards him (or not). Do you have same experience and how do you deal with this?
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ex-wife, his ex, jealous Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2018): You said you are losing your feelings for him. I don't quite understand your question. If you don't care and his lack of regular contact doesn't bother you; then I guess you didn't love the guy that much to begin with.
I suspect you've decided he wants his ex-wife; and he failed to pass your litmus test as to how devoted and faithful he is to you. I find it a strange co-incidence he would have an extended-tour of duty located exactly where his ex-wife is. How convenient.
Maybe it's best to let those feelings of indifference solidify; until you can just decide to end it. You can't love who you can't trust. Of all places he could have been assigned to work; he lands right where is ex-wife happens to be. He consistently shows up in pictures together. Maybe he has made a choice ahead of you.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2018): Read your own words, you have written how you feel, what is there to tell you, you know how you feel. If you don't care all that much you don't care.
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