A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i'm so worried about my engagement party becos of my family will spoil it. they wont argue with my fiancés family, no. they will argue amongst themselves, about petty things, and it will just ruin everything, cos they cant be around eachother. my mums side of the family are ok when its them, and its the same with my dads side, but when they're in the same room, its a different story. my mum and dad have been divorced since i was 8. and i was happy about it, cos it meant no arguements, but then my dad started telling lies to my gran and grandad, and now they dont like my mum anymore and it starts arguements every time.i just dont knwo what to do =( its gonna be such an embarressment if they argue.
View related questions:
divorce Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you for your honesty.
i really hope they will behave themselves for the sake of me.
if they dont then they cant come to the wedding. i want all my family there, but if they cant behave, then thats their fault.
A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit  +, writes (27 March 2010):
 Is eloping an option? If so, consider it.
Otherwise, you can always speak directly to all members of the family that you are concerned about this, and tell each of them directly that if ANY of them start to fight, they will be escorted out, and forbidden from coming to the wedding.
Another possibility is to have three engagement parties..one with your grooms family, and two separate ones with your two sides of the family.
My wife and I had to deal with problem relatives too...after they ruined our engagement, they simply were not invited to the wedding...they are still not over it, but they NEVER crossed that line again with us...they bicker at each other, but they never bother us as they know we have zero tolerance for it. I have to live with the fact that there will never be a "true" peace...but I do not care. Ruining my engagement is something that I am never going to get back to fix...so to heck with them.
-Frank
...............................
A
female
reader, nlieu279  +, writes (27 March 2010):
 You are a grown up. Tell them straight. Tell them you want the respect from them. Tell them if they have petty things to argue about then don't come to your party because it's your important and special date. Tell them you rather have less people coming to the party w/o arguement than have too many coming but embarrass you in front of your soon-to-be husband's family. Tell them arguing in front of his family will only make his family look down upon your family in term of family as a union.
If they are in fact know how to protect their image in front of someone else, I think they won't argue.
I'm sorry for being so straight and sound harsh. But that would be what I do if I were you.
...............................
|
