A
male
age
41-50,
*en_A
writes:I've been seeing this girl for a few months now. I really like her, no wait; I'm falling in love with her. She knows how I feel, but maybe not to the extent of my feelings. She also knows that I want to date her and she’s told me she really likes me, but she just doesn’t want to date anyone. She also will say from time to time that she will probably never find anyone and will be lonely forever (knowing how I feel). I am really certain that this is the one for me, but am afraid I may be wasting my efforts and will only lead to heartache in the end. Any advice? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2010): Don't let her discourage you. I said the EXACT same thing to my boyfriend before we started dating. He was completely in love with me, and I did like him, but I just was not in the place to be with anyone at that point. I knew that if he and I started dating, that it would be all or nothing, sink or swim, long-term relationship or no friendship, and I just didn't think I was ready. I even dated other guys, but only for short periods of two weeks or so. Like I said, I didn't want anything serious. Then finally, after months of pursuing me, my boyfriend said that he couldn't do it anymore, and that he had to stop talking to me and seeing me, because he just couldn't take just being friends with me. I was relieved at first, but then after a few days, something clicked in my mind, and I thought, "Why not just give this a try?" And you know what? It's the happiest I've ever been. We've been together for nearly a year and a half now, and we're planning on moving down to Florida together here in a couple months. His entire family is in love with me, and we are planning on getting married some day. We're looking at buying a house shortly after we get down to Florida. The thing is, if she says she's not ready right now, she's probably not.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2010): From a female's point of view - sounds as though she's not really interested. Sorry. I'd think that if she were interested, she'd meet u half way, or at least respond somehow to your admissions of having feelings for her. By knowing how u feel, and continuing to state that she doesn't want to date and her love life is doomed, that's pretty much a sign that she's not considering you. Either that, or she's revelling in the fact that you're completely nuts about her and is enjoying seeing u squirm. Either way, i'd move on and find someone who will return your love. Even if this girl does end up being persuaded to be with u, doesn't seem like her heart's in it - and it doesn't mean she's any better than u.
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A
female
reader, sunnycomet  +, writes (1 June 2010):
 She is not ready for a relationship so you should move on.
Good Luck!
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