A
female
age
30-35,
*iss sunshine
writes:i hate my boyfriend's ex's and not for a serious reason! i think im obsessily jealouse or something. you see, what happens with me is that we live both in france but we come from different countries. i come from greece and he comes from argentina. we met here in france so before coming here everyone had his own lovelife. my biggest problem actually is this one particular girl. before coming here he was with her in an "open relationship". he was her first experience (you know what i mean) and after that for 6 years they were all the time on and off. even the night before he came to france they were together. i am sure that she still wants him because she even has a boyfriend but did something with my guy!!! i can't get out of my mind this girl!! i know that 6 years is a very long time and i am SURE she is like in love or something with my boyfriend! although he is soooo in love with me and i know that, i can see that and even if i know that he was never in love with her and as he says "it was only sex" i am still so jealous of her. i see her talking to him everytime on instant messenger even if my boyfriend doesn't reply! after 3 or 4 times i saw that i told him to stop talking to her! so he agreed with me that it is not respectful to me when he talks with her and blocked her. i haven't hear from her 2 months neither did he. but i still can't get it out of my mind!! am i obsessed or what?? my problem is with all the girls he ever done something. i get so angry with them and i hate them!! what should i do? i really want to do what my friends say "just don't care for her" but i can't! it keeps popping into my head!
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different countries, has a boyfriend, his ex, jealous Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, nickismith  +, writes (24 July 2008):
He should not be in touch with her
he can always run to her for advice when problems arise and she will always have the satisfaction of knowing she means something to him cos she can contact and get his attention whenever he wants to
ask jim to block and delete her
A
female
reader, Miss sunshine +, writes (18 June 2008):
Miss sunshine is verified as being by the original poster of the question things going really better. i guess you guys were right!! just wanted to point out that we are better with my boyfriend!!!
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A
female
reader, Miss sunshine +, writes (23 May 2008):
Miss sunshine is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks peter pan! i guess you are right!!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2008): He has cut contact with this woman because he is with you so unless he cheats, try and put this behind you. I think you have handled it very well.
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A
male
reader, PeterPan  +, writes (21 May 2008):
 As we say here in the States, "Chill out girlfriend!"
Seriously, you're driving yourself into a frenzy over something you don't have any control over -- his "before you" past. There's nothing he or anyone else can do for you. Unfortunately, you're going to have to simply find ways to focus that anger into something useful... like take the anger and focus it into action... go jump your boyfriend's body when you feel that nervous tension building... or do something else that's romantic for him... not only would he be happy, but then you might start focusing all that energy on him rather than "them"... do you see what I mean?
Also, with your boyfriend agreeing to cut off communication with this ex, it definitely says that he values you (and your relationship) over the ex. Try focusing on your boyfriend and the here and now. Moments pass into history, but the "now" is yours. Don't waste it by focusing on what was.
Breathe in... breathe out.. breathe in... breathe out... calm... ohhmmm... :)
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