A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am going on a date with a guy this weekend but I think he might be closeted gay or bi. He doesn't dress sterotypically gay, or have gay mannerisms. However, he has made out with other guys before, in the context of truth or dare, but he seems weirdly proud about this fact, as in he likes to brag that "he is comfortable enough with his sexuality to do those things." His friends have actually refered to him as "heteroflexible" and he doesn't seem to mind. Also, he has more than a normal amount of gay friends, as well as a lot of friends who are girls. If he is in fact just heteroflexible, or even bi, that really doesn't bother me, I am just worried that he is gay, and in denial about it. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2007): Don't be worried. It's his problem. Go out with him and have fun trying to figure out if he is gay or not. Try to look for clues when he thinks you r not looking. I had a boyfriend for two years and at the beginning I thought he might be bi or gay and some other people thought so too. I went out with him anyway because I thought he was very gorgeous and thanks to God he changed with time. I gave him some advice telling him to change some things about the way he talked and some mannerisms he had and he did it. At the end of the relationship (4 mos.) ago he was more manly than when I met him. I still have my doubts about his being bi though LOL but I know he is not gay. I say go out with this gay and if he brings up the subject question him to death to test him and have fun. After all, nobody is pressuring you to marry him.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2007): This is a tough one. On first read, I think he is gay and in denial. However, he doesnt seem to be too aggresively anti-gay when you confront him. so its possible he's bisexual.I think most likely he wants it both ways. But its bullshit to think that making out with other guys is a result of his being comfortable with his sexuality. Straight guys just do not have any interest in making out with other guys.
Sorry, but I'm leaning towards him being gay..if he's devoutly religious I'd say start running now.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2007): Don't be worried. It's his problem. Go out with him and have fun trying to figure out if he is gay or not. Try to look for clues when he thinks you r not looking. I had a boyfriend for two years and at the beginning I thought he might be bi or gay and some other people thought so too. I went out with him anyway because I thought he was very gorgeous and thanks to God he changed with time. I gave him some advice telling him to change some things about the way he talked and some mannerisms he had and he did it. At the end of the relationship (4 mos.) ago he was more manly than when I met him. I still have my doubts about his being bi though LOL but I know he is not gay. I say go out with this gay and if he brings up the subject question him to death to test him and have fun. After all, nobody is pressuring you to marry him.
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A
male
reader, rcn  +, writes (20 September 2007):
 i don't know if he would be gay or bi. girls kiss other girls, without considering themselves other than straight. All I can say is I am a straight male, I know myself, and am in touch with who I am, but it would be a cold day in hell before you'd catch me locking lips with another guy. If I even attempted to do that during a truth or dare, they'd better be wearing a rain coat, I can almost guarantee they'd be wearing my lunch.
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