A
male
age
30-35,
*otmoney13
writes:Hey everyone i'm gay and i'm too afraid to ell a guy that i'm in love with him. i'm scared because i dont want to humiliate he and i but i cant stand seeing him everyday at school and after school and even before school, because theres this hole inside of my heart that only he can fill. again i'm terrified, and upto today he finds me this fearless, fiesty, funny freshman friend.: ironically he was the guy i fell for because of his looks, body, heart, kindess, sweetness, and the "i'll always be there for you when you need me" quality. i just can't seem to get him outof my mind. but he's straight(i think) no girlfriend, and of course a JUNIOR!!!! i'm really afrais to go after him in fear of losing what we already have when more than three weeks ago we had nothing. someone please i need guidance. lateley i've been avoiding him because i'm falling for him more and more everyday, and he's starting to get suspicous. what do i do? : Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2009): Hello,
I must admit, this is quite funny, not because it's you, but because I was in the EXACT same situation. I am a female, and I attend a private school. My freshman year, I fell in love with a girl that I had just met. This girl and I grew very close. At first, it was attraction, but then it grew more and more where I couldn't control my feelings towards her. Instead of telling her my true feelings, I waited and waited until finally, it was too late to tell her. We had already become best friends, and we were too close to actually be with each other. Sophomore year came, and she ended up with a guy. It broke my heart and all I can do was regret that I didn't tell her. Junior year has finally come, and she still has no idea that I fell in love with her. Two years of sleepless nights, popping pills, and drinking my pain away. That's how it ended up.
My advice to you:
Don't wait until it's too late. I felt the worst pain imaginable, and up to this day, I still wonder what could've been. Trust me when I say, TELL HIM. Because in the end, even if he doesn't feel the same way, at least you can say you tried. Good luck, and God bless.
A
male
reader, snoogle  +, writes (30 October 2008):
I had the same problem when I was sixteen, falling hopelessly in love with a straight guy who was my best friend.
I still feel after all of these years that all of the pent up frustrations and not telling him what I really felt at the time destroyed the friendship.
More importantly it also sent me into a spiral of depression that lasted for years afterwards.
I've fallen for other straight guys since then from time to time and if they end up being close friends I always try to be honest with them.
At first they're a bit uncomfortable, but they seem to accept it over time.
I think that there is nothing more soul destroying than bottling up your feelings.
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male
reader, lotmoney13 +, writes (29 October 2008):
lotmoney13 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionactually now i have been his friend for a while, and i think i might've lost my chance, but that will be a diffrent question. but since then i havent fell for anyone and he's my first!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 October 2008): Are you really in love with him? You said three weeks or something; is that correct? Maybe it's just a physical reaction. That's how it usually is with me when I crush on a guy. *shrugs* All people are different.
Well... would say distance yourself for awhile and see how he reacts to that. If nothing comes of it, go back to what is normal for you two.
Sorry, I know I'm not much help because I'm in the same boat. xP
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A
male
reader, yum yum  +, writes (11 October 2008):
 Hi dear!, I can really understand your situation its tough. You must be a very brave young boy to accept at your age allready that you are gay. I give you my very best advice, show him that you really like him as a friend only!. Try to be his good friend. Try and biuld up a trust relationship with him, tell him secrets see if he can keep them (but not secrets about you loving him). Be very very nice to him allways, even if he is not nice to you, if he loves you he might get nervous and do certain actions to keep you away from him because he is shy. After he proberly will want to get closer to you once you brake the ice. You just need to have confedents eventually you will see sighns from him if he likes you. If he ask's you why are you being so nice to me??, just tell him what goes around comes around. good luck!!
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reader, lotmoney13 +, writes (10 October 2008):
lotmoney13 is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni guess its just hard.... i want him so badly to know whats inside my heart....but at what cost? to be humiliated, to lose our friendship, to lose a guy i'm loving, or to maybe..... possibly.....hopefully.....it'll all fall in place without anyone getting hurt...more than i am evryday
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male
reader, lotmoney13 +, writes (10 October 2008):
lotmoney13 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank0you so much! you have truley inspired me. Well for his sexuality i really wanna say gay!LOL! but as for the truth i really dont know.... he's just getting suspicous because, on a day to day basis, i would see him and say "HI" or "You wanna walk around" but lately its getting stronger, my feelings for him, and i cant bear to see him when he dosen't know how i feel or me not knowing what he feels..... but your right guys are diffrent and i'm just not ready to tell him... and i'm afraid i will never be able to tel him...... well thank you so much you've helped me out more than you know.
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2008): Wow thats tough. He sounds really nice though. Does he know your gay? I wouldn't tell him, in fear of loosing your friendship.I have a bi-female friend that told me she was in love with me even though she knew I am straight but it's something she just needed to tell me, she was afraid of how I would look at her afterwards, of course I did not care and told her she's still my girl regardless =) but guys are different, there are some nice ones out there that will accept it or there are some that will take offense and never want to hang out with you again. So do you question his sexuality? is he gay also? how is he becoming suspicious? I wouldn't want you to scare him off. I'd hold off for a bit to see exactly where his head is at then make a move. GOOD LUCK!!!
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