A
female
age
,
*aylorcrash
writes:I have been married 14 years, it was both our 3rd marriage. We are getting divorced and he bought a house for him to move into. I am quite devasted about divorcing, even though I acted as if I wanted to be divorced I would keep changing my mind. He cheated on me 7 years ago for 1 1/2 years on and off before I found out, we were going to split up but begged him to try again and I would change. He is one to take no responsiblity. Well it didn't work there was many destructive things said and he was really cruel to me. I filled for divorce 3 times and the last 2 times I did it because he would tell me to go to an atty and buy him out. So I did this, he meet someone 1 1/2 years ago and was with her for a week and again I begged him back. Now we are divorcing he is staying with his new girlfriend the past week and will move out next Monday. I didn't know he had a girlfriend, he told my 13 year old son this is how I found out. Why do I have such a hard time moving on without him. I am so hurt that he is with someone else wishing it was me, because I remember the first 2 years were wonderful and then everything changed. What is wrong with me, why would I have these feeling when he isn't a nice person. All that I can think about is that she is getting the nice side of him now. I keep hoping that it won't last but I know that we cant be together. What are his changes of changing for another woman? Will it last? I could deal with this if he wasnt already with someone. I feel so rejected please help me.
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (18 February 2010):
The truth is that the first 2 years you knew him were an act. Nothing changed. His acting just ran out. Who knows if the other relationship will last. If he treats her as he treated you, it probably won't. I don't think he'll change. I think now is the time for you to sit down and take a look at your life. Instead of looking at it like you've lost something. Look at it that you've gained freedom from this terrible man. Make a list of things you now want to do. Go out with friends, start new hobbies, spend more time with your son. Just throw yourself into your life and build up your confidence and esteem again. You'll get there. It'll take time but you will get there. Focus on your own life now, and really do anything you wanted to before.
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