A
male
age
36-40,
*o587
writes:A few months ago before Christmas, a friend of one of my friends would come round our house to visit him. One day we were all sitting together in the house and she was arguing with another friend about something. I agreed with her and i looked at her and suddenly she looked deep into my eyes and i did the same. This happened for the rest of the night and when she left she waved me goodbye in what i can only call a special wave. She wouldn't do this to anyone else just me. She would come to our house every now and then and we would do the same again. I realized after waking up one morning that i had a crush on her and after being hurt in the past i didn't want to pursue anything. So i left it till after christmas but it was very difficult and awkward especially for me. Sometimes i think she would try to flirt with me but i became awkward and this would annoy her. Eventually i became comfortable with her and around her but i began to show off and she became annoyed and also awkward around me, i gathered id blown it and it was best just to leave it. So after a couple of months i began to ignore her, we'd wave goodbye but that was really it, we didn't speak or anything. At one point she was walking past me with her friends and i couldn't help but glance at her and she knew i was doing it but she completely looked straight forward with a little smirk on her face. I still managed to ignore her on the whole when she was round our place though. One day in particular she began to keep looking, sometimes staring at me and trying to get my attention especially with her eyes and body language and i was trying hard to pull away. Eventually i began to pay attention to her again. I then took a week and a bit off to go home to visit my family.When i came back i didn't see her for quite a while. When i did she would wave and a big smile would come on her face but she wouldn't stay long around me. If i entered the room she'd look straight at me and her behavior would change. She would listen to me attentively, copy my words sometimes and laugh at my antics. I was in our university library one day coming down the stairs from the top floor, she was walking on the second floor, she noticed me but made sure to not look at me and only when someone said hello to me did she look straight at me and she began to stare which confused me. I decide that theres no harm in telling her that i like her. The only time i could however was at this party we were having at our house. It was probably the worst time to tell anyone but i gathered if i didn't do it then it would be too late. When i finally did tell her, she was perhaps understandably shocked and then i told her why i liked her, which she seemed really touched by. She gave me her details but said we should talk about this when we were sober(i was a little tipsy when i told her and she was as well) and i agreed. She then left and i didn't see her again till the end of the party when quite a few had left. She only lives five to ten minutes away but she was going to stay the night. I've had a few drinks by now and so showing off i thought it would be funny to tap her on the leg repeatedly. Their was no malice behind it i was just being an idiot. This annoyed her and she then said that she was going to go into the next room. She didn't add me on messenger. I realized id been a bit of an idiot and she might not speak to me, so i sent her an apology email which she didn't reply to.The last time i saw her, she was purposely blanking me. I would try to talk to her, she would ignore me. I would look at her, she would look away. If she was alone with me she would move into the next room. Plus she spent the whole day flirting with my new flatmate, who she knows has a potential girlfriend and who he was going to see the next day. At one point i went down the stairs, she caught a quick look at me and then quickly looked away. The only time she acknowledged me was when she left. She did the wave she had always only done to me to my other flatmate and then looked into my eyes and slightly smiled and said bye.What i am asking after blabbering on for ever is how do i get her to speak to me again and is it because of the drunken incident or is it something else that is causing her to ignore me. I am potentially moving soon and the only reason i would stay is for her and so i need to know if anything could happen now. I'm not condoning what i did and i would certainly apologize to her face to face but she just wont have it. Sometimes it is difficult to read her, she would look at me and then she would turn away or be uncomfortable with me before i told her i liked her. Its been five weeks since i have seen her due to breaks and with exams etc it might be difficult to see her very often. I just want to repair the damage and if nothing is going to happen now, ill accept my mistakes and move on. Thank you for reading.
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christmas, crush, drunk, flatmate, flirt, move on, university Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2009): She put all the signs out there for you to see, that she was interested in you. Why didn't you do anything untill later? either give her a call if you have her digits, or if your know one of her classes see if you could talk with her before it starts. And if you cannot get a hold of her there for some reason, ask one of your guy friends if they can call a girl, that knows her to get her e-mail or phone#.
Personally I would drop it you really don't seem to know her, you guys really didn't talk that much, mainly looking at eachother and a wave good bye. Instead of drinking that night you should have said hay I'm going to be close to the enterance, so when she enters I'm the first person she talk to. You could have got everything out of the way then enjoyed the party.
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