A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:so, i am in a relationship with a man. and i always knew i was attracted to girls, but the more serious our relationship gets the more i really feel the lesbian inside of me coming out....Im afraid i am going to marry this guy just to divorce him for a woman... what should i do???
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, oldfool  +, writes (27 September 2008):
 Aren't you being a bit narrow here? There are such things as polyamorous relationships. There are people who live in relationships where the partners are free to have other sexual liaisons. There are people who've answered questions on threads about this, so you might like to go and check (e.g., do a search).
If marriage means suppressing all of these aspects of yourself in favour of strict monogamy, maybe you aren't suited to a monogamous marriage. (I've never been married, of course, but I'd always thought that it would be nice if a marriage could help liberate a person rather than stifling them... perhaps a pipe dream!)
A
female
reader, michelleAKAmandi +, writes (27 September 2008):
 Hey there,
Open up and tell him exactly how you feel. You have to share this with him for 2 reasons. 1. Because he deserves to know your true feelings. 2 Because you're keeping emotions pent up that can only cause disaster later. You never know, he may be happy that you opened up to him and understand. However; you also know that he may react the opposite as this may hurt his ego a little.
If you've never experienced being with another woman it could be mere curiosity or it could be that you are a true bisexual. I thought what I was feeling was curiosity, but it turned out it's been a life long thing and "being married to a man" I so very much miss being involved with a woman. However; I chose my path and now will live to be faithful to the man I promised myself to 3 yrs ago. Sometimes I wonder why I am as I am and don't know what to do so I write erotica stories to get out my frustrations. I guess the reason I tell you this is in hopes you find out who you really are before you get married.
Good luck and if you feel you need anymore advice, let me know. I'll help you in any way I can. Keep us informed of how things are going sweetie.
Michelle
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A
female
reader, thatgothgirl20 +, writes (17 September 2008):
 Be true to thine ownself.
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A
female
reader, ZeeZee +, writes (16 September 2008):
Don't get married if you're not 100% sure you want to be with him forever! You're young. Toss in a baby and I was in the same situation.
Be you. If you settle down now you might end up doing just what you're afraid of - divorcing him to experiment.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 September 2008): my advice to you would be firstly to discuss your feelings with your partner, he may have trouble with the concept of you being attracted to someone other than himself but if you are in a trusting, loving relationship (and it sounds like you are) he will understand and probably be pleased you opened up to him. I can sympathise with you here as I often feel attracted to women however once I actually had the opporunity to be intimate with another female I found it was merely a fantasy and not what I really wanted. This may not be the same for you but either way you need to find out what will make you truly happy and be honest with yourself and your partner. Done live your life wondering what if?
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