A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have always been an impulsive person, and for quite some time now, I have been spending money like there is no tomorrow. I am buying things very impulsively when realistically I can't afford to. But in the moment, I don't care, its like I "need" the item. And I get a strange thrill.It has gotten to the stage where I can't pay bills because I have ended up spending money I have saved for bills.I have definitely noticed that this splurging on material goods seems to happen when I am depressed or unhappy, or have had a stressful day. I'm not being funny, but I think I have some sort of shopping addiction!I realised this today, when my partner was getting important tests done, I ended up spending money on an expensive pair of shoes that I didn't need before the hospital appointment, and I have to be honest, as I was sitting waiting, all tense, the shoes I had bought gave me a real sense of relief,sounds ridiculous right? Then I sat on my phone, and ended up spending more money there and then on internet shopping.I hope I don't sound like a spoilt brat making excuses for treating myself too often, but I really do think the thrill buying things gives me is getting out of hand.Am I just giving into temptation easily, or could there be a problem?
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (8 August 2014):
 Anything you HAVE that you can TAKE back for a refund you TAKE BACK right now and get a refund.
Are you using cash or a charge/debit/credit? If you are buying all this crap on your card then DO NOT carry you card on you for a while, have enough cash (not too much) for emergencies, transport, food and such.
IF you have any credit cards... CUT them up and pay them off.
I would also suggest you try a diversion. Wear a rubber band on your wrist. When you see something "shiny" snap the rubber band a few time. It might remind you that you CAN say no to "shiny" stuff.
And stay away from stores that tempt you the most.
It's NOT really uncommon for someone who is out on their own for the first time, to not be super great with money, you have recognized you have a problem and you are looking to fix it.
When I first moved out on my own I saw a pair of Italian kid-leather boots - gorgeous! And I bought them, with the result that I had maybe 20 Pounds for food for the WHOLE month. I basically lived on Ramin noodles and the "free" apples at work. And the Sunda meals at my parents. After that.. I didn't make the mistake of buying something on impulse.
Sit down, MAKE a budget. Give yourself (if you can afford it) a small sum for "crap you don't really need".
A
female
reader, Dionee'  +, writes (8 August 2014):
 There is a real problem. You have an addiction which is just as serious as drug additions and alcohol addictions . . . Basically any other addition which is often seen as much worse. The truth is, everyone with an addition is on the same level. Spending money they don't have to give themselves a false sense of happiness even for just a few hours . . . Or days. I recommend that you seek help specifically for your shopping addition as someone professional will know what to do and how to guide you. Maybe you should do some research on your addiction and maybe start to help yourself in small ways based on the research you do. Small steps are much better than no steps at all. You need, right now, all of the help that you can get and because money is tight because of your addiction, you will need to step up and accept that you have this addiction and that you need some help which is a step you're taking right now by being here asking for advice. Do a lot of research and get some help that you can afford or join groups of people who are battling with the same addiction. It will help to know that you're not alone in this. When you go out for your grocery shopping and such, perhaps it will be good to make a list of the goods you will be buying while you're still at home and then make sure only to (beforehand) draw out around about the exact amount needed for the grocery shopping so that you won't have to carry credit or bank cards and be tempted to spend the money that's meant for the payment of bills. Its a step in the right direction and its worth a try. Its an addiction that you can beat but remember that it won't be easy and that it requires a lot of hard work on your part. If you accept that it will be a challenge but you're willing to work through it then you're well on your way to a full recovery. Good luck OP.
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