A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I'm 26 and have never had a serious boyfriend. I've been on dates and for the first time, I casually dated a guy for 8 months! He did not want to commit, but I'd like to count this as something. I am cute, young, funny, smart, interesting, talented and nice but I can't seem to catch a man!My friends don't have any eligible cute guys I could meet, and I work with married girls and gay guys at my job who don't know any straight singles either. When I go to bars or out, I never meet anyone cool, nor do I get asked out. I'm trying so hard to seem approachable and confident, but I'm still a lonely single girl. Something must be wrong with me that guys want to be my friend but they never think of me as datable.Any ideas, tips, good places to meet single guys? I've tried online dating, going to the gym, classes, but I never meet any good guys!!Help!!!!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2010): hey i'm a cute, funny, smart, educated fireman and i keep getting involved with the wrong girls..i want a simple life..i cook, work on my house, hang out with my family, ect..seems like girls these days aren't looking for that..they want to have more "fun"..we're in the same boat =)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI probably sometimes give a vibe that I'm standoffish but I'm just shy. I need to get outside my comfort zone and start approaching guys instead of waiting around.
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A
male
reader, RAINORFIRE +, writes (14 January 2010):
 Interesting its funny because i cant get a date because all the girls i happen to talk to are disgruntled bitter man haters that havnt gotten over the mistreatement from the last 6 jerks they dated and wont give me the time of day.
I agree with lexie you should just take a break, If i found a girl attractive enough i could probably work around anything else i didnt like about her, in fact i would probably try and correct those short comings.
I dont think your problem is lack of attraction maybe you are too polished sometimes guys like a girl with some jagged edges, also its possible that they are intimidated by you, you may meet a nice guy in the bar but he may feel his fast food salary isnt on your corporate level.
personality well i would have to talk to you to kno what that was like but maybe you have a personality flaw that turns guys off it may be somehting simple like bragging, constantly talking about an x I dont kno, all is not lost though.
You may be trying to hard alot of guys and people in general want what they cant have maybe you should play hard to get doll your self up reall nice when you go out you gotta make these guys turn heads theres hopefully. I was in a bar once and a girl came in she had on a short jean skirt and a white tank top a pink bra and pink heels, she was attractive but no more so then any of the other girls but she had every guy in theres attention all night.
well thats about it the only time i would just want to be just friends with a girl is if she had a serious personality flaw that would make her not suitable for datiing or for some reason i wasnt attracted to her
Hope things work out im sure they will, guess ill go play xbox yep
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2010): It is getting around to the point, these days, that far and away the best place to meet people is the on-line dating sites. Arguably one of the best ones is plentyoffish.com, and it is free!
Good hunting and fishing!
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A
female
reader, Lexie88  +, writes (14 January 2010):
 I was in your situation a while ago. I'd like to think of myself as attractive and succesful but I was having so much trouble meeting quality men and sometimes I settled for less and dated jerks.
I don't think you need to go anywhere specific to meet someone...what you need to do is stop looking. When I stopped looking and told myself that enough was enough, and that I was going to enjoy my life just the way it was, I met the most amazing guy.
I know that me telling you to stop looking is not helping you right now but what I'm trying to say is that you perhaps need to change your attitude about meeting men. CaringGuy is on the money here...men, and women I think, can sense when you're on the lookout. When I was single I would treat every outing as an opportunity to 'find' a man...and I think it shows in the things you do, how you behave and what you say...guys don't like that.
So when you do go out with your friends, forget about meeting a man...go out to have fun and enjoy the night...if you hit it off with a guy, don't expect too much from him, let him chase you. If you don't hit if off or you don't even meet a guy, don't get yourself down...say to yourself that you enjoyed your night out and that you're living your life.
You say "I'm trying so hard to seem approachable and confident, but I'm still a lonely single girl." You have to change this. Don't 'try' to be approachable and confident, 'be' approachable and confident. I think people can see through this and if you have a negative view on your situation, it definately shows through.
So, tell yourself that you will enjoy each day, whether you have a man or not...and as soon as you stop making meeting a man the number one priority in your life, you will meet someone.
Good luck...I hope you come back and let us know what happens :)
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (14 January 2010):
Maybe you're trying too hard? Good guys can find it all a bit scary if a woman comes across as working too hard, because it can unintentionally make you come across as desperate. So just relax about it all a bit more. Of course there is a guy out there for you. Also, you need a hobby or two, where other men are, than you can just get to speak to guys and understand how we think a bit more. Also, then you'll have something in common with a guy if you share the same hobby as well. And don't be afraid to ask a guy out yourself either!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2010): Which guys are you attracting that do not interest you, please?
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