A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm a 13 year old girl. I feel like running away because this has been going on so long. I feel like I have no friends anymore and everyone in my grade probably hates me. And I feel like my family doesen't love me. What do i do? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, ray-ray  +, writes (15 December 2009):
 I know how it feels because I do run away and it makes things worster trust me i think you should have someone to talk to tell your mum and dad and maybe move schools all the best xx
A
female
reader, blobby12345  +, writes (27 November 2009):
iknow how you feel i feel exactly the same but running away solves nothing. I argue with my mum all the time and feel she doesn't love me but i knwo she does. I am sure your parents love you and no way does everyone in your grade hate you. please don't do it you could die and wat does it solve your mum worried sick the police searching and then you dying of pneumonia in an alley. Think before you act. This is not all about you it could affect everyone around you. If it results in your death or you being seriously ill wat have you gained from running away with no money. SO PLEASSEEE DON'T RUN AWAY FROM HOME JUST READ THIS EVEN IF YOU THINK IT IS CRAP AND IS SO NOT HELPING!!!!!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 March 2008): i know how u feel but i have no money && no where 2 go
...............................
A
male
reader, guitarhero3  +, writes (5 February 2008):
Im going to be pretty straight forward on this, dont run away, I am your age too, and i know what it can be like with everything going against you, but you have to pull through, running away from it all won't solve, it you have to be strong, you will make it , but dont run away. Hope you feel better
...............................
A
female
reader, deejuliet  +, writes (5 February 2008):
 The teenage years can be awful, just awful. And I really mean that. I, like you, wanted to run away thinking this would give me a fresh start so that I could live the happy life I knew I wanted. I tried at 14, was caught and put in counciling. I tried again at 16 and was caught again and brought back home. I am so greatful now that my parents cared enough to go after me and bring me home again. My life was so miserable! I hated it! I thought that running away would solve things, but I now know it would have only made everything so much worse. Chances are I would have ended up a prostiute or worse just to get by. Where would I have lived? I would have been on the streets soon enough and if I even lived to be an adult I would have only been able to have minimum wage jobs and lived in squaller. Instead I have a good job and a lovely home and 2 of the most beautiful children you've ever seen. Take it from me, the teen years SUCK! But eventually you will get through them. My advice (and if I could time travel this is what I would do!) is to stick to school. Study your little heart out. Dont worry about boys at ALL. A social life is secondary to getting good grades right now. Get good grades, go to a good college and get good grades there, too. Then once you have a good job and a good life, then worry about dating and finding a mate and all that other stuff. Believe me, it will come! I am 40 years old and have been asked out by 5 differant guys in the past 2 1/2 months. Dont worry it will pass you by. It wont.
...............................
A
female
reader, shandygirl +, writes (5 February 2008):
 When I was your age, I was picked on by other kids. I was called names, and I had to physically fight all the time, to defend myself. My homelife wasn't great either. My Stepfather had a used car business, and I had work there every weekend and all of my summer vacations. I wasn't allowed to have friends. And plus alot of other things were going on that I won't go into detail. But boy O boy, I was depressed all the time! But, I never thought of leaving the 'safety' of my home. The reason is that I always communicated everything that I felt.... to my mother. She helped me a lot!
At times, when people are going through a depression, their perseption of what is really going on around them, becomes distorted.
I am sure that your family REALLY cares about you, and that you still do have friends. Reach out to your Mother for help, talk to her. Let her know everything that you are feeling.
I agree with the other people here.... Running away is NOT the answer.
All of us are here if you need us! :)
...............................
A
female
reader, Dancertainier +, writes (5 February 2008):
At 13 thats pretty hard to feel like that, its also very vague in your question, what is the root of the problem here...??
Are you having trouble at home? or is it school in general?
My advice is to talk to someone about it, even though you feel like no one is going to listen to you Im more than certain your mother would be besdie herself if you did run away and she would much rather you came to her with your problems instead of just running away.
Its very sad when young girls your age are unhappy but please rememebr this is not forever, life gets better, and you should keep a smile on your face, you have your whole life ahead of you, dont waste it by being sad so much.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2008): Being 13 is a tough age. Everything is changing. Your body is changing, your thoughts are changing. Friends are changing. School may seem different too.
Without knowing more about your family situation and why you feel you are not loved I can not advise you as to exactly what to do.
But here are some thoughts. Sometimes our parents are so caught up in what is going on in their lives that they might actually forget about their kids a little. They have a lot of responsibility. And sometimes people can be thoughtless. That being said. Running away is not the answer that is right for you. No matter what is going on.
Personally I think being 13 just smacks of confusion. Because we are changing so much during that time frame. Hormones also cause a lot of mood swings during that age.
Here is what I think you should do. I think you should continue to go to school. Not worry about who likes you and who doesn't. Instead... this would be the ideal age to begin to like yourself. Form an opinion of yourself. A good one. Join clubs at school. Do your homework well. Be proud of yourself regardless of what others think. The minute you don't seem to need friends is the time when they will all flock to you.
If things are terribly bad at home. And I know they can be because they sure were for me. Then talk to a trusted councillor. Like the school councillor or the principle or the teen hotline. If things are bad enough then the authorities will be called in and at least you will have a safe place to be.
Running away by yourself will only lead to trouble. How would you support yourself? There are all kinds of issues with running away.
All I can say is..... I hope your parents love you and support you in a positive way. But if they don't and things are terribly bad at home....then seek council from a trusted adult. They will know what to do. But if it is just everyday type of confusion that being a teenager brings on... and it is natural by the way.... then just try to focus on things that make you happy about yourself. Do things that interest you and keep your mind occupied and your body healthy. And the rest will all fall into place.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2008): Honey, I've felt this way. People in my grade called me a whore because I had a boyfriend (who abused me), my parents treated me really unfairly, and my friends stayed away from me. But I blame puberty for the feeling of wanting to run away.
Things get hard, undoubtedly. Everyone feels low, some especially low. So low that you just don't see the point any more, and I've felt that way, but running away doesn't help. It seems like it'll be in the movies, where you make it big time or your family tells you how much they love you and come running for you. It's not like that. Sleeping rough is cold. Hard. Terrifying. And want to stay with friends? Do you think their parents will let you? No. And if they do, they will certainly tell your parents. Police will be involved, you could be on the news, people would search for you.
You can't just change your identity by running away - it really doesn't help. It never takes you far, and nothing is solved. You just guarentee your loneliness.
I think the best solution would be work up the courage to tell your mam, and some of the load on your back will be put onto hers. She can help you through this hard time, no matter how much you think she doesn't love you. I promise you that she does, she's loved you since the moment she held you for the first time in her arms. If you look into it, you'll see all she wants is to protect you, and never wants you to be upset, so you should talk to her. She's there for you. Or maybe if you have a councillor at school, or a particular teacher you know would do their best to help? You're never alone honey. There's plenty of hotlines out there for you to spill your feelings out to.
If you'd like to talk, just message me, I've felt how you feel, I promise you. I've been lower than you could imagine, and God, it dragged me into some situations. But really, there's hope out there. You've got a lot of life ahead of you to look forward to, and you won't be in high school forever. Before you know it, you can move out and start on with the life you've always dreamt of ok? Really. It won't always be this way, and you won't always feel this way. Cheer up, I'm here if you need me.
...............................
|
