A
male
age
30-35,
*llionhart
writes:My girlfriend and I have been dating for almost a year now. At first were were having fun and I can see that she loves me as much as I love her but now things got a little bad for me. She told me about this guy that she was talking with on the internet and how mature and how fun it is to talk with him. Since then my girlfriend started to act weird. Even though she keeps on telling me that she loves me whenever I ask her, her actions doesn't show that she loves me, before she would text me almost all the time just to call her, but now she doesnt even want to talk to me, and seems like we always have fights and arguments, I gave her everythin she asked of me but she doesn't even show that she loves me seems like she's more interested on that guy she met on the internet, I tries telling her that we should end our relationship, she told me that If that's what I want so be it I cannot control you. Thanks for the pain you've caused, then I asked her, pain that I've caused? I dont even think that you ever loved me and I think that you never even liked me, she told me that "you thought wrong, you were everything I wanted" so we were on good terms again, but she started doing it again and it really confuses me.. I really love her, I wanted to leave her a lot of times but I always end up feeling that I need her even though she treats me that way, I always think that if I hold on a little bit more she would love me again, but nothing's happening..
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male
reader, Griffo  +, writes (9 April 2009):
 What a crappy girlfriend... you deserve much better from somebody, i know you must feel for her and this situation but if you can find it in yourself somewhere that you may need to prepare yourself to move on it would help you greatly.
Ive had girlfriends that tell their friends they love them too its only a friend love nothing more, but when it becomes serious from the guy they freak out anyway because she really loved me not him. In your case it could be the same thing but im not there to see the finer details of the sitution.
tell you that you fell uncomfortable with it and then leave it. you dont want it to ruie your relationship with her. start hanging out with some girls that are only your friend too mabey she will get a bit jealous too.
If she dumps you then thats her problem not yours, she loses you. you dont lose her. nobody deserves to be treated on "edge" all the time thats not what a relationship is about... a relationship is about sincerity, commitment, forgiveness and love. and many more things.
let us know how you go.
A
male
reader, ellionhart +, writes (3 April 2009):
ellionhart is verified as being by the original poster of the questionUnless of course this other guy is just a friend and your too possessive and becoming too jealous of their friendship thinking its going to tear you apart and somday shes going to be with him... If your doing that to her... you WILL lose her.
It's exactly what's happening she told me that they're just friends and I've got nothing to worry about, but the thing that makes me worry is that they call each other with their own sweet names and they started saying I love you with each other.. though I asked she told me that it was just a joke.. but even as a joke I still take it seriously
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A
male
reader, Griffo +, writes (2 April 2009):
Mate that does not work. As i said you need to tell her, and if she wants to be with you then be with you - not some other guy. just say something like: "Look, your my girlfriend right?" She'll say yes. Then say "Its not normal, nor hardly mature if you spending all your time with another guy. I really liked you. but you are sure as hell doing a good job of tearing us apart... Is that what you want Name?"
This should get her thinking, but dont be wimpy about it be tough strong in your voice but not to overconfident.
Muffling your expression of love by showing your blindness does not work. do what your heart says.
Unless of course this other guy is just a friend and your too possessive and becoming too jealous of their friendship thinking its going to tear you apart and somday shes going to be with him... If your doing that to her... you WILL lose her.
I hope everything works out.
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A
male
reader, ellionhart +, writes (2 April 2009):
ellionhart is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI tried not to be enthusiastic as much as before and act like Im not interested in her even though it kills me inside.. Seems like because of it she found another guy on the internet, she keeps on telling me again that they are just friends, but it seems like she spends more time with him than me.. I dont want to look dramatic but it really kills me inside, Im acting in front of her as if I dont care but really it really hurts
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2009): Well here we go again... U know wat, U both in the same situation that i can call puvirty.. Let it go.. move on to your life and see, when time came back and she still there then U really meant to each other. what about focusing on study I think it will help, Books is easy to love & i promise U, u will never get hurt unless U read sad story. I pray for you
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 March 2009): Sounds like she wants to have her cake and eat it too sweetie. It seems to me that you are her comfort zone and that way if one of these internet guys doesnt work out then she has you to fall back on. Dont put up with it! Get rid of her for real. You deserve better than this.
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A
male
reader, Griffo +, writes (24 March 2009):
Id tell her to get ... If your her boyfriend, and she told you of another guy who's more mature and all that crap then what the hell is she doing being with you... ?
Mate if she's so mature she wouldnt be checking out other guys on the internet behind your back... yeah real mature. she needs to grow up herself.
But mate, don't blast her. You need to be smart! You need to stand up for yourself. she not very mature herself and obviously has issues with her self.
She luring you to dump her, i say let her do it, not you, and when she loses you its her loss.
Hang in there!
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A
male
reader, funnyintit  +, writes (24 March 2009):
 i feel bad reading that... but u have to chill with her, leave her do wat she wants.... i know its hard not to be enthusiastic but u have to stop and make her realise what she is doing... it seems like shes taking u for advantage, like u will always be there.... get busy, if u cant get busy even lie and say you are busy! sometimes this works, maybe 50% of the time... otherwise she isnt the 1 for u, can u put up with this bullshit for any longer???? always stay positive! ;)
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