A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I don't know what to do. My boyfriend (of 2.5 years) made a female friend about a year ago who has a lot of emotional issues. She is depressed and cuts. He has always been there to support her even to the degree that it has pissed me off because she had her own boyfriend. A couple of nights ago she got drunk and slept with an ex fwb. She texted my boyfriend the next morning saying she needed him to help her through an emotional crises. He had an exam in the middle but spent the afternoon with her.Then today her boyfriend broke up with her because of the cheating. She sent my boyfriend a really weird text and he was worried about her so he went to check on her. He found her with cuts up her arms and she'd swallowed several packets of painkillers. He called the ambulance and maybe saved her life.Now I don't know what to do. I was always nice to her but resented her leaning on my boyfriend. I don't know if I should go visit her in hospital and try to help or what this will mean for us now. This is such an awful situation to be in. How do I handle it?
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2014): That is a tough situation to be in when a bf's friend is needy or unwell, and let's cut to the chase, the fact she's a female doesn't help. Being there for a friend is one thing, but doing so at the expense of a partner is not so good. Your bf needs to place your needs first, imo. And, he needs to set boundaries with his friend. She isn't thinking of his gf (you) she is thinking of her own pain and issues. Even back when she had her own bf, she still called your bf to vent. Sit your bf down and lovingly tell him how you feel. While I feel deep empathy for this girl, sounds like she is always going to be self-absorbed and have drama in her life, and he has to choose to be at her beck and call or not. If he continues placing her above exams and your feelings, reconsider if he is someone you want to continue dating.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2014): tell him how you feel, its as simple as that. he'll understand. just tell him you feel like hes spending all his time focusing on this other girl and has forgotten about you and that you need him too. good luck, i hope all works out
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2014): Trust your boyfriend.
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