A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I had been dating a guy for a little over one month. He definitely went above and beyond to show me he was totally into me. I have a marketing company and he owns his own business. After a few weeks of dating he asked if I would like to put in a proposal for his new website. I said yes. I cut him a slight deal. Nothing more than what I would normally do for friends and family. He accepted and paid the deposit. That night we were going through photos for his website and a pic of his ex who is drop dead gorgeous popped up. It was one of her most recent modeling photos. He apologized and deleted it. The next night I sent him an email saying that I thought he wasn't over her and we should go our own separate ways. He replied and said that it is sad that I think she is still in his life and that he can't believe my behavior of sending an email like that. That hopefully things will stay professional with the site. The next day I tried to talk about it and he said I made a mistake and I needed to learn from it. I apologized and he said I hurt him. Now I still have to work with him and I see him about every other day. He still calls me dear and honey, opens up to me about personal things in his life and we have had sex once recently since the breakup after working together 3 days in a row. We have worked together twice more since then and he has not initiated any more contact other than a tiny bit of flirting and some deep convo about life. We have never talked about us from day one. I am not an open person and I know I tend to make guys confused. I have said things like... wow it is really hard to get over you when I have to see you all the time... or when I have to talk to you it makes me miss you. I don't say them often.. but he knows I am interested. What should I do? Forget about him and move on? Or should I try telling him how I feel? Or should I just ride things out and see how it turns out? I tend to not be very emotional or open so I don't want him to think I am not interested. Ahhhhh help!
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks everyone! Yes, I am quite aware I need to keep my insecurities in check but thank you for the reminder! After this evening and reflecting on the last 3 weeks since the incident, I do think he is still interested in more than just sex. Mostly because he feels the need to tell me almost nightly that he is going to sleep or just got done working, or just generally letting me know what is going on. His site will be finished next week and we will no longer be working together and I just don't know if I should walk away or speak up. I feel like we are both dancing around with what to do next.Normally I would just wash my hands or even just continue a sex only relationship. I up until this point wasn't worried about men wanting me for sex because that is all I wanted/needed from them. (I know that sounds bad but I am busy and successful with my career and haven't found a man that interests me mentally) This guy and I are completely on the same page and we have insane similarities and we have worked together amazingly on his site. He very much respects me as a put together woman and knows that I am an even keel person. I don't think he thinks I am crazy. I am just concerned that I have two avenues to take. One- try again to let him know I am sorry (I was hurt badly years ago) Two- Let it ride. I am not going to walk away from this one. I just don't want to become "his friend" instead of "girlfriend" in this process. I think the next week is going to be crucial in how I go about this!
A
female
reader, QuirkLady +, writes (25 April 2010):
 You seriously overreacted, especially since you had only been dating for a month. He had a picture. He apologized and deleted it, and that should have been the end. But honestly, when you flipped out and accused him of not being over her (over a picture, of all things) you ruined whatever could have been. He's fine with having sex with you but in his book you're too crazy to date, which is why he doesn't respond to your signs of interest.
Next time try to keep your insecurity in check.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2010): I think you over reacted he deleted it and it's obviouse he's realy into you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2010): i myself feel that u should let him know how u feel....n go frm there see his reaction.....if no good then move on time is all youll need to get over him good luck...
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