A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes: for 2 yrs since my husband's dad died he has changed new job, selfish, wanted to do what he wants,lies. Anyway I finally kicked him out. 6 months later we are back together trying to work things out but i feel I am doing all the effort. A small amount from him i thought he would treat me special but he doesnt want to talk about anything he has no affection for anyone, still wants space, a pub where he doesn't want me to go but can ring and i can pick him up.been married 25 yrs i have lost a lot of trust, need reasurance. Anyway found a message on his mobile to a girl but he said he doesnt know anything he doesnt know who it is, i rang it she hang up, he wouldnt ring it from his phone as hasn't done anything wrong. he said he sends messages to girls he works with, and he lends his phone, message was "love u please u have been so good, will ring u when i get homexo" just going through a bad patch, whats your advice please Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Landie  +, writes (6 January 2008):
 I understad what you must be going through even if I'm young. You tried to give him another chance and you are still trying from the sounds of it.
But it does not sound like he even cares. It also sounds like he is cheating on you.
Only thing I can tell you to do is to leave him. Even if you have heen together for so long. You might love him but if he carries on like this what type of marriage do you really have.
You have to think whats best for you. What if he is cheating on you and is having sex with this women? Even if they do use condoms, they can still break and what if he gets a STD and pases it on to you.
I'm sure you would not want that. So prevent it now and leave him.
Good luck
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2008): It sounds to me like he's being a complete asshole and you know it yourself. Obviously he's making up stories such as "lending out his phone!?" That is complete bull. Sorry for such harsh words but I get really mad when people cheat on their significant other (wether be it man or woman) and do not have the guts to tell you the truth. He's using for a backup, someone who can take care of him while he has fun outside. It is ultimately up to you whether you want to keep taking care of him and taking all the crap he gives you, or you can kick him out again and find some peace in yourself. You don't need a man to be happy. And if you do, find the right man. If he doesn't want to cherish the 25 yrs between you two, there's no point in you trying so hard. I believe everyone deserves a second chance, but clearly he's not using it well.
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A
female
reader, AJ jess ^..^  +, writes (6 January 2008):
 Hey hun i believe that perhaps this man is not worth your while if he is showing no affection for you and seems to be with other girls you deserve better. On the other hand there could be something that has become misunderstood somewhere along the line, i suggest that you sit down with him and even if you have to force him to make him understand what you are going through and ask him what he really feels for you good luck hunnie xoxoxo
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A
female
reader, stawberry01 +, writes (6 January 2008):
 It seem that there is no trust between you any more. He may need some more time, saying that someone eles is using his phone isn't gd he should talk to you as you are his wife a the end of the day and not someone how he meet at the pub. give him a bit more time if things dont work out try talking to him again make him open up to you.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (6 January 2008):
 You have given him another chance and if he does not want to play ball with you ,what else can you do but to red card him again. Or you can close one eye , see no evil, hear no evil and speak no evil.Will you feel better if he is not around? You will have to weight the pro's and the con's.
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