A
female
age
51-59,
*orried and upset
writes: I just found out my husband has been texting another women all the time sometimes 100 times a day. When I confronted him he said they were just friends and she is just someone funny to talk to. When I asked him to explain why he accuses me of not trusting him and If I dont trust him then maybe he should just leave. I don't understand. I love my husband deeply and everything seems fine with us I guess I'm just concerned. Could this lead to something more and should I be this upset. Help
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 February 2014): I recently went through this. Trust your gut. I knew my husband was contacting this woman. He lied and denied, but I knew better, and kept probing.She was the most arrogant, disrespectful thing I've ever come across. She told me she and my husband are just friends, so DEAL WITH IT. Excuse me??Bear in mind, he was out of work at the time. I was the only one working, for a year, until very recently.While I was struggling to pay bills, he was texting and hanging out with this woman, going to the bar with her, doing her favors. No, I wasn't about to DEAL WITH IT.She'd start texting him at 5am, before we even got out of bed and text all day, every day, until about 11pm, 12pm, 1am. It was ridiculous. I finally went online and discovered he was texting this woman over 100 times a day, every day for a year!!!Long story short....I called a lawyer and I meant it. If he EVER HAS ANY CONTACT WITH HER, EVER.....HE WILL BE A DIVORCED MAN....PERIOD.He has no business putting another woman before his wife. PERIOD. Which is more important? The "friendship" or his marriage?I would not put up with it and I haven'tThere is nothing wrong with having friends of the opposite sex, as long as it's not a secret.This is just ridiculous.Don't put up with it.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2011): Hes being very confrontational, threatening to leave if you dont trust him. Whats to trust? Youve just discovered hes in constant contact with another woman! That sounds very suspicious and so is his response to your discovery. If there is up to 100 messages being exchanged between them in a day, then they certainly like each other a lot! I would definately keep an eye on him, something isnt right.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2011): sorry, but this doesn't sound good. i found out my ex-bf was doing the same thing - hundreds of texts to a mysterious number. i rang the number one night, and got through to a random girl who told me he was 'messing around' with her and that he'd told her we had split up (whereas he had told me a week prior that he wanted us to get married!) i think you can only get the truth by speaking to this woman. be strong.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2011): It is completely abnormal for a man to text ANYONE, much less a woman who is not his wife, 100 times a day on a regular basis. There is something going on here for sure--whether an emotional affair or full-blown adultery. You have EVERY RIGHT to question him about this. If he doesn't bend over backwards trying to explain himself to you, then it's even more suspicious because he is covering up by accusing YOU of lacking trust. His behaviour demands explanations. I hope you get them.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (31 March 2011):
it may be an emotional affair.
his defensive behavior is telling and this may be a red flag.
if he has nothing to hide ask him if you can talk to her....
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (31 March 2011):
I agree this sounds excessive. Even more worrying is how defensive he got. If there was really nothing there then he would be reassuring instead of angry. It's fairly inappropriate to have a female friend he texts 100 times a day. He may not have cheated, but something is definitely up.
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