A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:My partner and I have been together for nearly 15 years now, it's been on and off for the last 5 years though. He has a drinking problem which he is beginning to recognise. He actually stayed off it for nearly 6 months. However he broke out 2 months ago and when he came home I said to him to go sleep in the spare room and we'd talk in the morning. However he walked out the door. He does have a small studio apartment which he keeps for financial reasons. Since then it has been a total nightmare. He comes and goes. He did come home for good in theory but after one night he went on a message and i didn't see or hear from him for nearly a week. He constantly lets me down when we arrange to meet. We have two children together. He says he wants to be with me but not until my middle daughter has left home. She is a difficult person and has caused many many problems. She is 20 now and whilst I do agree she should move out I refuse to choose between them. He is also very secretive. He has a friend whom he calls constantly, up to 15 times a day and normally when i'm not around. His children don't want anything to do with him(13 and 11),he hasn't been contributing anything financially towards them but is quite willing to spend days at the house where he is always fed. I'm at my wits end, I know it seems obvious that I should not have anything to do with him but I do know he loves me in his own way. He is suffering from something and just can't bring himself to get help. I am the only person who really knows him. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2008): Hi Hunny
Alcoholism is a horrible disease that can not only affect the person that has the illness but the family can be torn apart by this hunny, My son has been an alcoholic for many years now and its taken years to get through hell is the only way I can put it, For him and us as his family...The only way your partner will get well is to do it himself because he wants to. You said he wont come home untill your middle daughter has left you say she has caused many problems, Well he isnt really the model figure and really has no right in the judgments of others hunny being the older here..I can understand you sticking by her as thats what I would do all the way love. Your at your wits end and I no why, Its horrible simple as, When they are drunk they dont care about anyone but themselves they dont care who they hurt or what pain is caused...Its painfull to watch sweetheart if that person is a lovely kind hearted soul without the drink, Ill send you some links to help you as you said he wont help himself, At least you can get some support and help hunny.....
http://www.al-anon-ireland.org/
http://uk.dir.yahoo.com/Health/Diseases_and_Conditions/Alcoholism/Support_Groups/Al_Anon_and_Alateen/
Hunny I hope this helps you, Thinking about you WITH LOVE AND PRAYERS MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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