A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have a problem with the way I'm treated at school. No I'm not being bullied, but I'm treated many different ways. See I'm a really happy person at school, I laugh and smile at school every single day. Because of this some people call me stupid and treat me like I'm retarded and they think they can just run over me because i laugh and smile it off but deep down the little mean comments they say hurt but I can't help but to keep a smile on my face because that's just how I am. I don't like being mean to others. But I think I'm going to have to..One day i think I'm going to become more upset. Because it's starting to get to me. I dont see anything wrong with laughing and smiling all the time but other teens do. (I know you thinking why I just don't tell someone)who wants to help, because I have a reputation of being happy person and telling what might solve anything, especially when your a senior in high school. I try so hard to ignore them but it's starting not to work. I try to go to school and be quiet and keep to myself, but I can't help but to laugh and smile and be active with others. I think its time i be mean but i dont know where that may lead because it may be a fight because i do have have a mean street and a attitude deep inside me i havent showed at school. How do I deal with this because it's starting to bother me when the say hurtful comments and run over me?
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2011): The problem is that you have been putting up a front. It may be a means to hide and pretend you are invincible but the sad thing I dont like about society is that its not 'manly' for a guy to be hurt, cry, or be sad. Some old outdated mentality that young men, boys have to hurrt and grow up and be 'a man' but saying this and teaching this has killed a lot of young mens EMOTIONAL Intelligence.
Young men, boys should be allowed to have feelings, to be vunerable, have self expression, be able to cry when hurt or sad or even moved by something beautiful. Young men should be able to be sensitive, intuitive, compassionate.
Yet the old mind set says that young men that are so, are babies or weak. WHAT A LOAD of POOP!
So now we have young men, like you, who get to an older age in teen years who are angry, resentful, bothered, ticking time bombs and people wonder why?
I DO suggest you speak to a counsellor. Because it sounds like you totally fit into this whole dynamic and growing trend of angry young men rebelling and going gangs, greater numbers of bullies, even the sweet, normal young men that are having outbursts to the point we get situations like in Canada, the greyhound incident with the man and the sword attacking and killing another man.
Counselling will help you express, deal, feel your emotions and that they are healthy, normal, and get you back to being compassionate, passionate and even to recoginze that sometimes its okay to get angry and can do so and not be verbally abusive, offensive or appear like a bully yourself.
Telling someone straight out ' you know I don't see why my happiness is such an offense to you'. Are you alright? Do you need to talk about anything? Could shut them up.
Or even saying, you know, you could just try to be a nice guy and leave me the hell alone. I have done nothing to have you mock and bully me with your taunts. Also, is standing up for yourself and pointing out their behaviour is in question.
Most bullies often shut up after being challenged. Yes this is a form of bullying.
So, Counselling in school is a first step. Using your voice is another choice.
Keep in touch. Please.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2011): Why change your attitude to indulge in someone elses.
SO what, let 'em be mean, learn to maintain your happiness these comments will have to slide off you like water.
You could be the next Robin Williams. Read his biography you'll learn alot there too. He was bullied constantly.
In the meanwhile, be you, be happy, laugh, live and above all to thyn own self be true.
You're gregarious life may one day cure many lives. You are why we make movies. Live it.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (19 November 2011):
 Why don't you stop acting and be yourself for instance. You are not this happy jolly always laughing type that you pretend to be, because you are NOT happy about everything. For instance you are not happy about the comments your schoolmates about you. You are bothered by stuff, like any human being, nobody is happy 24/7. And, you know that you have a mean streak and an attitude deep inside, that you are keeping in check- good, but you could control it also without wearing a clown mask.
Sorry but I can understand the comments, if you smile and laugh ALL THE TIME. It's disquieting, who are you, The Joker ? And you are in highschool, not in kindergarten anymore, so you must understand that there are moments for laughing and having fun and cracking jokes, and moment for being serious. Like when the teachers explain their lessons. Or when your friends are talking about something sad or serious. Having a class clown it's nice- to some extent ; if you exceed ,it gets disruptive and annoying.
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