A
female
age
30-35,
*rogz
writes:okay so im fourteen and i hang about with people 3 years older than me , i dont know why i suppose ive always just got on with older people better. ive only had one boyfriend before.. no boys ever like me, any i like back,. im quite a picky person and basically i need help coz i want a boyfriend now, its got to the stage where i need one. all my friends have oone. and i suppose i would just like the comfort of someone being ther. i liked this guy he is 18. but i know he wouldn't go near me as im not his type, he goes for the stunning blonde and im complete opposite.i need help and well fellas especially would appreciate if u were to comment and say how you would feel about going with a girl 3 or 4 years younger, i would say im pretty mature but i have my moments lol.. comment soon x Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2009): Babes I understand what you are saying... I think it's the story of my life... I am 15, and I have loved this guy who is 18 for nearly a year now... and yet, he believes that my age is too much of an issue. I thought he felt the same way as I did - or maybe I just have a tendency to misinterpret things? Or maybe in a few months when I am "legal" according to the goody old legal system he'll suddenly turn round and declare his adoration for me. I can only hope. Oh, I really don't think it's healthy for me to spend so much time deliberating this! My situation is a little different from yours... I have never tried to emulate my peers... probably because I do not have many friends me own age - I have never found I relate to teenagers. I am told I look and act several years older. And the "love of my life" - he is so like me, I feel I have a deep understanding of him so why does he refuse to talk to me? Is it because of my age (despite the fact our relationship had never been of a sexual nature) or because I am too "intense"? Most likely. Or are there other issues holding him back. I deleted him on Facebook the other day, though I now sorely regret it. I feel like Scarlet O’Hara for anyone who understands this reference... however, I know that my mind can never be swayed. I do not love this young man because of any psychical attributes - he is certainly not conventionally good-looking. But to me, he seems so undeniably perfect, an outcast, a pathological liar... and yet he is my soulmate, I just know it… I have consulted psychics on this matter. So what does this say about me?
Okay - back on topic.
ArmyMedic, how is this blatant peer pressure you have described, to quote, 'if your mates find out you get branded a peado!" not a prime example of emotional immaturity on your part?
I have never been romantically attracted to boys my own age and in most cases not even those 3 or 4 years older (disregarding the one exception). The lack of attraction is mutual funnily enough - I seem to be favoured by the pervy 40-somethings (sorry - generalisation. :P). And they too do nothing for me.
Oh.. yes...Brogz, I see no problem with you pursuing this guy... if he does want you for sex (as most 15-year-olds are just as likely too) be sure to use condoms.
Dye your hair blonde and wear miniskirts, if you believe this may help persuade him.
Oh and to answer your question - I would have no qualms with dating a girl 3 or 4 years younger. :)
xxx
A
female
reader, love'me  +, writes (16 April 2009):
my bf is 3 years older than me and its fine.but i undestand you want a bf but don't rush it because you feel pressured by people around you. and deffenetly don't go out with someone just because you feel you need to, go out with them because you love them. good luck!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 April 2009): i say.. go for it! my boyfriends 18, and im 14 as we11. sure people might go 'wtf?' but if u rly lik someone age doesnt matter. its good to be friends for a while tho first, and just bcuz ur not his 'type' doesnt mean he wont lik you. as for the guy saying he'll b scoping out other girls while ur 'stuck at home'.. dont listen to tht. i went 3 weeks w/o seeing my bf, n he swore he didnt look at another girl (we hav a mutual trust thing) so best of luck, i hope it all works out for you, just be confident and b urself, how could he not want u?! xx Liz
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female
reader, brogz +, writes (16 April 2009):
brogz is verified as being by the original poster of the question ok..
its weird you see he's not like others hes reali soft and gentle, nice guy.
i dont want one coz all my mates have one, i wud just like the comfort of someone being ther for me.
ive got into clubs before becuse of the way i look, people think im 18 when they 1st see me.
thanks for your comments they've helped me slot (Y)
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male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (16 April 2009):
 My wife is 4 years younger than me, but at 18 I would never have dated anyone under 16 and probably not anyone under 18. Sorry but kids are boring, they talk about school, can't go out to the pub with you, and if your mates find out you get branded a peado!
No always best waiting till a girl has passed 18 and then she will be looking for the same things and have a bit of life expirience.
I'm sure you are VERY mature for your age but you are still 14 and would want different things from an 18 year old man.
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male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (16 April 2009):
My wife is 4 years younger than me, but at 18 I would never have dated anyone under 16 and probably not anyone under 18. Sorry but kids are boring, they talk about school, can't go out to the pub with you, and if your mates find out you get branded a peado!
No always best waiting till a girl has passed 18 and then she will be looking for the same things and have a bit of life expirience.
I'm sure you are VERY mature for your age but you are still 14 and would want different things
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male
reader, unluckyinlove45 +, writes (16 April 2009):
 lovely you don't want to go out with a guy whose that much older than you.chances are he won't want to stay in with you he'll want to be out with his mates go drinking n tha.best to stick with someone ya own age like.i mean there are only certain movies u can see an all i mean he may want to see an 18 but you wouldn't b able too ya too young,and how you know when he goes out he won't be looking for someone his age?while your at home?guys can be into younger girls but not tha young,sorry love.best of luck though yea? (Y)keep lookin.peace! J x
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female
reader, ilovebowsandcherries +, writes (16 April 2009):
 hun having a guy alot older than you can lead to complications people will talk about him and you saying he's only after one thing and the guy may not be that comfortable with a girl so young.they probably look for girls around there own age i mean what if he went out?i mean you can't go out clubbing with him or drinking with him.he'll feel a bit tied down and don't just want one because your mates got one its not a fashion trend hun.you're better off finding someone your own age or a year older than you but 3-4 at this stage is a bit steep.Hope this helps hun :)message me you need anymore help.
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 April 2009): No, no, no. Girl, it's just wrong. You want a boy because your friends have one? Wrong. And especially wrong because the guy you have your eye on is so much older.
It doesn't matter what your friends are doing. What matters is if you find someone who likes you, who's in tune with you. Who's going through the same part of life you are. The 18 yo hottie is not that. And you're thinking you have to change to get his attention!? No!
Just chill. Find a boy who's right, not a player. There's no rush.
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male
reader, Volcomjlc  +, writes (16 April 2009):
yea my personal opinion is I would feel weird about going out with a girl 3 or 4 years younger than me my advice is try to find someone around your age to go out with hope i helped
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