A
male
age
36-40,
*rycebb
writes:My wife is extreme gorgeous and she is currently 8 months pregnant with our first child. I will admit I was kinda worried about the whole pregnancy thing and how it would effect our sex life but it has only made it better. I am very turned on with her physically. We have always had a great sex life, usually doing th deed four or five times a week. I am worried how ever about the Birth, we are planning a home birth and I'm afraid seeing a baby coming out of "there" might be a turn off. and I worried how lose it will make her afterwards.
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (21 October 2015):
 My brother saw his first child born. He told me it was like seeing a bluefish emerge from his (your) wife..... and he proceeded to throw up and leave the room. (He didn't repeat this for his second kid....)
Do what you wish... but keep a barf-bag handy....
Good luck, and congratulations....
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 October 2015): You will realize how the spirit/ life force is stronger than the sexual. Do you ever think about when a woman blooms in pregnancy, could it be the new life energy glowing? The most important experience in your life and it does not happen as often as sex, that is common place really.
Try putting your bottom lip over your nose, it stretches back into place. :)
Priorities.
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (20 October 2015):
 If you think she's beautiful now just wait until after you see her give birth to your child. You can't think this to death. There is NOTHING more beautiful than watching a life come out of "there"
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (20 October 2015):
 First thing's first - don't overthink everything! It's like when you take a big pill and you psych yourself up that you'll gag on it, and you end up doing just that because you thought about it too much.
Same here! First of all, she's not going to "loosen up" just because she had a kid. How many women have multiple children in this world? Apparently, a kid didn't get in the way of the ability to become intimate.
However, after the baby is born, you will have to consider quality over quantity in those early sleep-deprived months. It's a completely different mindset from the free and easy non-child living. The good news is that it doesn't last forever! Just be fully engaged in helping with the workload around the house and with the baby's care, and once in awhile, spring for a sitter to get some R&R, and you'll be back to a rich full sex life!
You were concerned with seeing a baby come out and it being a "turn-off". Remember, not *everything* is sexual. The fact that your son or daughter is born, if you've got a pulse and aren't a complete psychopath, is going to overwhelm you emotionally in a great way. Such a great way in fact that your brain won't connect the two events. You'll be more in love with your wife for being the mom of your child, and you'll see your son or daughter and it'll be earth-shattering. My husband cried like a baby when our son was born.
As for "loose", I've done kegels ever since I was a kid and didn't know they *were* kegels. Also, the first 6 weeks after your baby is born, there is absolutely *NO* sex allowed, because she'll be healing up. My husband and I did other things during that period when we could.
95% of the time, guys complain about their wives being too loose because they get too used to their own hands/grips due to masturbation, and they also get too used to porn overstimulating them. To give you a different analogy, say the normal person with normal sleep patterns sleeps for a specific period of time, then wakes up refreshed and has energy for the day. On the other hand, the heavy caffeine addict NEEDS the artificial stimulation of the chemical, and has migraines, lethargy, lack of energy without it. That's the difference between a natural sex drive and a porn-addled one. I'm fine with porn in moderation, but get addicted, and there'll be ED, getting too used to the images and the grip for stimulation, and then all of a sudden a guy, being in denial that he overconditioned his hand, his penis, and his eyes for the artificial stimulation, will blame his wife/girlfriend for being "too loose".
If that happens to you, back off the porn and reboot, and you'll find that you'll be rock hard and ready to explode for your wife even if she's had 10 kids. You sound like you love her, so don't fall into the porn trap during the 6 weeks and during the tough sleep baby patterns! You'll do fine!
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (20 October 2015):
 Seeing your child being born is a life altering experience for many! "There" is very elastic, and as long as your wife follows advise regards pelvic floor exercises etc, it should return to normal after about 6 weeks.
I understand you are worried about a lot of things now, and things can go wrong, but they are the exception, not the norm.
Good luck, and congratulations!!
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