A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm dating a guy who's 8 years older than me and I'm 17. He kind of freaks me out a little, because everytime we talk on the phone or in person it always goes to getting in bed. I really don't feel comfortable doing that so soon, but i seem really pressured, and I don't know what to do. He says I won't scare him away no matter what I say, but I don't believe him. How do I tell him that I want to wait without him breaking up with me? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2008): If he were your own age, would you be thinking of giving in to him?
No?
Then there's no reason for you to give in to this guy's demands now.
If it's true that "age doesn't matter" then you'll stick by your guns, even if he (probably) leaves.
A
male
reader, williemanxx +, writes (2 April 2008):
I know this type of guy, I was him. I pressured my girlfriends into having sex at 15 I was 17. But this guy is 28 and he is just after your flower! becarfull please when you two are alone. Just till him the truth if he walks then he did not love you. But if he stays with you for a year or two without having sex then there might be something there. Becouse with my high school sweet heart i wated a year and did not presure her at all and she was the one who started wanting to have sex.
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A
female
reader, aeris  +, writes (2 April 2008):
Every time he brings up the 'having sex' thing, tell him that you're saving yourself for marriage or something similar (you can always change your mind later if you like :p). If he truly loves and respects you as a person, he will be willing to wait. Let him know that he is making you feel pressured and make it clear that you will not have sex with him yet.
If he isn't willing to wait for you or continues pressuring you, he's probably using you and you should get out of this relationship as soon as possible.
(Btw, if you feel the need to do something sexual with this guy, there are many things that a couple can do that doesn't involve the actual sex act... just use your imagination :p)
Hope that helps! :)
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