A
female
age
41-50,
*aima
writes:My husband is nice but he gave all his property and money to his parents and sisters without knowing me. Now he says I will save again for you. Usually we have fights almost every day because of his stupidity. I know everyone likes their parents but this doesn't mean you give everything to them and then you say to your wife I will start to save it again. I even don't know what type of parents they are. I don't even think think that if anything happened how my son will survive at least they should return my husband's money but no they didn't. I don't know but now I don't like my husband, how do I believe him, maybe one day he will give them again. I can't ask him because he never listen. I tried so many tricks, maybe soon I will get a divorce, there is no way out. now we have no children.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, here r ways out  +, writes (11 November 2008):
hello dear
i can understand ur feelings absolutely as my husband is same or much more he sacrified his life for his parents and sisters who took away all money from him and they r still sucking him bld suckers and keep insulting me on top of it.....so for u there r other things u sud consider 1.does he really lov u or is his lov limited till u r with him in supporting his family 2. is his attitude towards u gud enough that this truth can be lived with 3.after leaving what u caN do ..remarry and if again husband turns like that than...or u dont marry i m saying so becose large people r like this.. financial conditions also matter so pl. consider that ..
whatever u do think 2 times cooly..
A
male
reader, anil m +, writes (11 April 2008):
Well-thats sad!
The father should arrange for the security of the family-but if he is not doing so, it is not wise to divorce him! Coz i fu do so-u and ur son will never get anything
Pl consult some of ur inlaws relatives-take their help!
or go legal about it!
Continue staying till u get something!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 March 2008): What his family wanted him to do – you having an abortion and adopting one of his sister’s children is very strange and troublesome. Based on your flag, I assume that you are originally from Singapore and currently live there. Where is he from? Is he from India? I am making that assumption because you said that you went to India for healthcare, as you had no money for your healthcare. I can see why you are so angry with him and his family. You feel that his giving all of his money to his family is the cause of the death of your baby. You may very well be correct or it might be that having the money may not have saved your baby anyway. You will never know, but I fully understand your sadness and anger.
It sounds to me like his family doesn’t like you because he didn’t marry the woman who they wanted him to marry. However, when he made the decision to marry you then it was his responsibility to put his wife and his coming baby first. That doesn’t mean that he should not help his family if possible, but you and the baby should be his main concern. As I said, his family’s attitude is very troubling and his obaying them is just as troubling. My family didn’t like my first wife when I was 21 years old, but I knew that it was my decision and my responsibility to take care of her.
Why has he been gone for so long? Is he visiting his family? If so, why couldn’t he have come home to you in your time of pain and trouble? I am very confused by all of this. To allow you to suffer by yourself through all this pain is not right.
I feel for you, but I do not know what to suggest. I do have some thoughts, but I don’t want to express them right now because I don’t want to give you wrong advice. Perhaps you could give us some more information about your story. I hope things go well for you in the future, but you have some big decisions to make now.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 March 2008): Hunny
Your not wrong, So much has happened how could you be wrong, You have been on your own during this awfull time this is worse than I thought, The first time was worrying enough, Now you have explained things so much more I really do feel for your situation, Hunny please message me I have sent you a pm we can talk I really do now understand much better...Sometimes its hard to put two and two together when you answer so many questions, But I found the link and now you have explained futher Im more clued up of your situation message me ok hunny TAKE CARE WITH LOVE AND PRAYERS MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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A
female
reader, Gena Bullock  +, writes (18 March 2008):
 I agree with one of the other aunts, you need to clarify some of your statements in order for us to be able to better help you.
Like, how long have you two been married? When did he give his parents/sisters the money? Do you have children from another relationship? THings like this will help us help you.
Gena
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2008): thanks mandy but i know about his family my marriage is love marrige and within 10 days i had to came singapore for my final exam and that time he did that stupidty. His family have enough money sister are working well and getting smart salary only they use my husband becasue they was not happy of our marrige. till now they are not talking to me even i just had 26th week misscarrige but my husband talking with them even he knows that when they got to know that i am pregnant they told to my hubby go for abortation and adopt one of his sisters daughter. now tell me am i wrong? no mandy i am not i am trying to save my love life but these type is things making me crazy. yeah money is important y i had misscarrige coz my husband had not enough money thats y i came to india for delivery and here when i had complication that time doctore was helpless they said we cant we dont have enough equipments to save your child thaty they did my abortion. noow still you think i am wrong ok he loves me but love cant give back what i have lost it hurts mandy.........just imagine how i was feeling that time when i deliver dead baby.
now my husband is comig to see me after 1 month and teeling me that we will go to some place for outing but still i cant forget anything weather i will go anywhere. doctor told me next time again get complication so may be you will never concive again.
now tell me y i dont blame him even his parents . mandy if everything will be ok or if i find him ok lovable so ok otherwise definately i will go to someoither country without telling to anyone and will never see him.
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A
female
reader, deejuliet +, writes (18 March 2008):
 I am sorry Raima, but I dont understand a few things you have written in your post. Perhaps you could explain things better? For example, first you state that if something happened you dont know how your son would survive (I presume you mean if your husband died), but then you state that you dont have any children! Which is it? You also say that you dont even know what kind of parents they are. Havent you met them? Dont you know your in-laws? This confuses me. You also say he gave everything to them without 'knowing' you. Does this mean that he gave it all to them before he met you? If so, then you cant be too angry as it was his own choice with his own money. Yes, it was a very foolish, stupid choice. Perhaps he thought he would never get married, so he gave it to them? Now that he is married, he should not be giving them any more money. It should go to you, for your future together. I am sorry that I am not being much help here, but if you would clarify your situation I think it would be easier to help.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2008): Hi Hun
Ive just realised something and I no you have written a post last week and ive answered it ok, And I no there is more going on in your life at the moment than all this money changing hands...If you need to talk as you must be very upset at this moment as arguments are not what you need please fell free to message me hunny anytime ok TAKE CARE OF YOU WITH LOTS OF LOVE MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2008): Hi Hunny
Do you mean he gave all his money and property to his parents and sister without telling you? That makes a huge difference the knowing and telling bit...Without arguing hunny did you ask him why he did this, As arguing is not going to get the money back and if you love someone then it unconditional..I can understand if now you are both struggling to live because of this, Maybe your husband wanted to help his family maybe his parents have worked hard all there lives and he wanted to give them something to make life a little easier and so they could enjoy some time together..His sister may have been struggling as well and he may have wanted to make her life a little easier...If he has a good job and can save a fair bit of money then in his eyes he is maybe thinking well It wont take me long to put away ex amount of money for the two of you then everyone is taken care of....And he feels happier for it. I dont no the whole story of his family and that kind of thing but I would sit down and try to come to a compromise and not argue as it only gets you down sweetheart...If you have never met his parents it would be nice to ask if you could meet with his family one day to get to know them, Then you would see maybe why he has done this hunny..Is money really worth a divorce is not love more important...I hope this has helped love PLEASE TAKE CARE WITH LOVE AND PRAYERS MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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