A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and i have both use drugs in our past. I have recently stopped but just because i got bored and burnt out. He on the other hand likes to use them on rare occasion i do not wish to restrict him but sometimes i do worry. how do i handle this without coming off completely possesive?
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female
reader, Lost_Soul85  +, writes (2 March 2008):
What kind of drugs are you talking about? Me and my partner used to love drugs a bit too much, to the point we were both snorting grams of cocaine every night. This was incredibly destructive and brought bad things into the relationship. We haven't been like this for a while. Our relationship has settled down and we are happy. Occasionally (I'm talking every once maybe every 6 to 8 weeks) we will buy a bit of coke, maybe got to a club and do some pills. This does not affect us in ANY way. I will sometimes go for a smoke at a friends house, when I do this I tell my girlfriend and then spend the night at my place away from her. As long as its not consistent, as long as he's not cutting out massive amounts of time with you to go and take drugs, as long as he's not dependent, as long as he isn't aggressive or paranoid because of his drug use. Does he hold down a job? Does he love, respect and care for you? Those are the important things. Everyone needs a hobby, so just let him get on with it, as long is does not have a tangible and negative affect on your relationship. Chances are he'll get bored of drugs eventually. Whats that quote, "I took drugs and I had a great time, didn't lose a single job, didn't kill anyone, laughed my ass off and then went about my day."Let him have his fun, to my mind having the occasional spat of drug fuelled mayhem is no worse than having a bit too much to drink.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2008): ''Sometimes I do worry.'' Sometimes?! Hang on a minute, you wont stop him using drugs and wrecking his life because you're afraid of appearing possessive. Are you crazy honey? He's gonna ruin his future, his career/studies, everything. He's ruining his body. And you dont even have the heart to just stop him? Really well done for coming clean yourself, but now you've got to help him. He'll thank you in the future if you do, please, this has to end now before it just gets worse. If in the future you want children, do you want him being around your own child with drugs? Honey, its hard for you, I can imagine, but its time to stop his unhealthy habit.
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