A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:There is this girl that I like and been talking to for a while and she just got out of a bad relationship with her ex-boyfriend (he didn't love her anymore, stop caring) Talking to her for a while and i really do care about her. What happen is she was over my house one time and she brought this notebook were a list a songs was in it (making her a CD) but she also had this secret letter she wrote to God about her ex-boyfriend. I read it on accident and i did tell her, she doesn't hate me but she also doesn't trust me and I think I mess up my chance of being in a relationship with her. I constantly apologize for what I did but I don't know if it works, also gave her the gift bag (CD, letter explaining, flowers, candy, and a poem). Is there something more I can do or say to make everything right.
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female
reader, YouWish +, writes (10 June 2010):
 Time is what you need. Did you ever tell her why you read that letter? Sometimes, you can turn a bad thing into a good thing.
Tell her something along these lines:
"I was very in the wrong to read that letter you wrote, and I hope you can forgive me for being too eager to get to know you. I know a relationship is all about intimacy, and I want with all my heart to know everything about you, because everything you are touches my heart. I promise to learn about you the right way, to ask you and to listen to you, and I hope I haven't lost my chance in doing so by my one moment of weakness."
You can totaly turn it around by baring your soul to her about your feelings. Girls love to be valued, big time!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 June 2010): Ok. Let's be honest. It might have started by accident but once you knew what it was, your curiousity took over and you wanted to read it because you had feelings for her.
Almost any guy in your shoes would do the same thing. Not many would admit though, so props for that.
You already apologized what sounds like a million times. And bought her not only one gift but a bag. Wow. Yes, it was something you shouldn't have done but if I had a letter that had that much value to me I wouldn't leave it in a random notebook at some guys house.
So the deed is done and you said your sorry. Don't dwell on it and for Gods sake don't apologize anymore. You don't want to seem too clingy or needy.
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A
female
reader, EKnight  +, writes (10 June 2010):
Oh boy... don't buy her things to try and get her trust back. She will only think that your shallow and trying to "buy" her. Instead meet her somewhere and tell her that you want to talk. Hold her hands and look into her eyes and tell her that your sorry and that you didn't mean to invade her space, and that you would do anything to take it back. Tell her that you think her letter was amazing and that she is a good writer. Also tell her that you understand why she doesn't trust you and you would do anything to get her trust back. then HUG her, only a hug because if you try to kiss her she might think that your just trying to get in her pants. IF she wants to kiss you, she will let you know.
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A
male
reader, HAWKEYE_189 +, writes (10 June 2010):
You are def. going in the right direction. I would see what she says after she takes time to go through the gift bag. Also the fact that she has been through a bad relationship recently may not help the situation. I would give her some time. Best of luck bro.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 June 2010): How do you read something like that by accident. You should have stopped at some point without reading to the end.... If you did, let her know.
I don't think there's anything you CAN do except be different from this point forward. I mean she exposed herself in that letter, and you read it. She knows you know these things about her now. I don't know how anything you can do will change that fact. Imagine how you would feel if you bared your soul in writing and someone had access to it?
Sorry I'm not trying to make you feel bad, but if you really care about her, let her know you care and are sorry and that you are backing off to give her space and time. You'll just have to wait it out or you'll weird her out more.
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